Parkette

The End.

2011-08-11T21:50:00.000-04:00

"You are not a terrible person for wanting to break up with someone you love. You don’t need a reason to leave. Wanting to leave is enough. Leaving doesn’t mean you’re incapable of real love or that you’ll never love anyone else again. It doesn’t mean you’re morally bankrupt or psychologically demented or a nymphomaniac. It means you wish to change the terms of one particular relationship. That’s all. Be brave enough to break your own heart."

-http://therumpus.net/2011/02/dear-sugar-the-rumpus-advice-column-64/

Heaps.

2011-05-31T09:00:00.002-04:00

Where are we?
What the hell is going on?
The dust has only just begun to fall
Crop circles in the carpet
Sinking
Feeling

Spin me round again
And rub my eyes
This can't be happening
When busy streets
A mess with people would stop to hold
their heads heavy

Hide and Seek
Trains and sewing machines.
All those years
They were here first

Oily marks appear on walls
Where pleasure moments hung before
The takeover
The sweeping insensitivity of this
still life

Hide and Seek
Trains and sewing machines
(Oh, you won't catch me around here)
Blood and tears
They were here first.

"Hope ya still like me..."

2011-05-25T00:15:00.002-04:00

Naturally when things are actually going on I don't blog about them, but the dust is almost done settling until it gets kicked next week.

Let me clear a few things up: yes, I landed a receptionist job in Manhattan. Yes, my sister, after long hours of stress and determination fueled by Starbucks and the excitement of living with me, found an apartment for us to share in Murray Hill. I'll be moved into my own room completely by June.

I've been trying to imagine what my room - my new HOME will look like. I don't want another dorm room suffocated under collages - I want to hang up frames with photos and art. I don't want a hole in the wall like I did in Bed-Stuy. I really want my little room to feel like my first home as an adult in the real world.

I should probably be more worried about what I'm going to wear in New York, but I figured I'd just toss all of my black dresses and high heels in my vintage Samsonite suitcase and hope for the best.

Yes I've graduated but anyway

2011-05-16T23:25:00.005-04:00

Dear Diary:

I was cleaning out my closet and I found that I have ten LBDs.

Because of this excessive number, I got rid of two.

I feel lighter already.

Love,

Liz

P.S. I'm not counting my newest maxi dress because it's not little. And I don't have a problem.

Second Day as a Post-Graduate

2011-05-09T09:42:00.003-04:00

It's surreal to wake up this morning.

I woke up this morning with no Granny to make tea for (she was moved into a home in California for Asians), no homework assignments due, and no where to be other than my computer looking for employment opportunities.

I mean, the unpacking of my college accessories is still waiting to be done (it's in the dining room) and I will have to walk the dog at some point, but in other words, things are going to be pretty slow.

I guess that means for blog entries for The Parkette.

Wish me luck!

Post Seminar Celebrations

2011-04-21T08:53:00.003-04:00

Yesterday marked the last day I would ever have to do Seminar work ever again. When the five hour test was done, I immediately put on Facebook "BAAAAAAAR" and tweeted "BAAAAAAR" with the tag of "#BAAAAAAR".

You can already see where this is going. But we've all been there before you can't judge me. At least not the drinking part.

I met up with my two blonde classmates, both named Hannah, where I started off with a strawberry daiquiri and a shooter. I made the mistake of eating chicken tenders while I was drinking and not before. But at the time, I didn't care - it was a celebration! Seminar was over!

If you know my tolerance at this point, you would assume I was feeling purr-itee good at this point. I strolled on over to a nearby bar to meet with with more Seminar peers who wanted to celebrate. Good ol' Jack slowed things down for me since I could sip that slowly and converse, but then it became an amazing idea to do jager bombs! Why not? Seminar was over! Celebrate!

Um, yeah, maybe I should've have admitted I was done then. Cathy kept offering me her chicken tenders and I told her I already had chicken. If I had any more chicken I was going to "shit a live chicken onto the bar". People thought this was funny and laughed, but I guess my liquor-drowned mind assumed that their laughing meant they didn't hear me so I said it again. And again. Being an appropriate member of society apparently didn't have a lot of bearing for me.

Okay, that's embarrassing, but whatever. People say stupid things all of the time when they're drunk. That's why we have textsfromlastnight.com.

However, another shooter later, I felt ill. I wanted to be responsible so I announced I was probably going to throw-up and excused myself to the bathroom, something that could have easily been done in a discreet manner. Unfortunately for me, my boyfriend called at this moment and I handed the phone over to my two male Seminarians, who were the ones to tell him, sorry, your girlfriend is drunk right now and just went to the bathroom to throw up. Uh, yeah. Sorry. Bye.

There's another winning moment during my celebration.

I didn't upchuck, which was promising. I asked Ann(e) the bartender for a tall glass of water. She happily obliged. I left the bar around 9:30pm, meaning I had left early while everyone else was planning "going hard" for rest the night. "BUT WAIT," I justified to myself, "if I leave early in the evening, I'll go to bed early and not have any trouble waking up in time for my class tomorrow! Such a clever Liz!"

Waking up on time was never going to be an issue.

After falling asleep somewhere between 9:30-10:00pm, I woke up promptly at 4:00am.

I did not go back to sleep. I was not hungover. I was awake and unhappy. I putzed around my room, packing things here and there and changed my bedsheets. This was all proof that I should never go to sleep any time before midnight. This was absurd.

I had breakfast, wrote some notes down for my review class at 10:10am, and now I'm here, writing about it.

I'm not sure if the post-Seminar celebration was a success or a failure because of these occurrences. A success for me waking up without a hangover and being somewhat productive; a failure for my dignity from the heinous things I blurted out at the bar.

It's important to note that this does not happen frequently, which is why I'm bothering to blog about this. So kids: don't drink. Just be happy that your hardest class is over and have some ginger ale over a game of Shoots 'n Ladders.

My Addiction.

2011-04-03T19:35:00.000-04:00

The collages started off small enough: binder and folder covers, birthday cards for friends, etc. However, the zen-like state I entered when collaging started to verge into entrapment and then obsession. Here is a wall of mine from high school. Note that it is mostly compromised of things I made: paintings, drawings, doodles and other collages. Some magazine clippings here and there, but still essentially my works of art. Post high school graduation, shit got real, due to moving off to college and I was busy with classes, my job, my Roanoke activities, and being social in general. There wasn't as much time to sit down and draw. After getting over the awkward hump of freshmen year, I relapsed and got some girls on my hall floor to participate in decorating every inch of the corridor.

Everything was plastered with magazine clippings, posters, and even color book pages we had done ourselves. I'm positive not everyone was pleased with it (it's stimulation overload, apparently. And did I mention a gigantic fire hazard?) but it all stayed up until the end of the year when we were forced to tear it all down. Another recession happened junior year with my semester abroad and my second semester in a room that I applied minimal decoration to. Why bother for only four months? Then Senior year came.

Back with a vengeance.

Yikes.

Senioritis, dude.

I restrained myself from only doing two walls in my room, but I could have easily done the entire dorm if I felt like it. And it's all from fashion magazines. I even tried to color-code them.

Anyone need anything collaged? My preferred canvas is at least seven to eight feet high.

...I have a problem.

Hey Arnold! Fashion Ideas - CF, please don't sue.

2011-03-30T22:52:00.011-04:00

Okay, so hopefully at some point of reading this blog or within the first five minutes of meeting me, you became aware of my interest in fashion. I like attire. I like outfits. I write for CollegeFashion.net. Now while I thoroughly enjoy doing my research for blog posts featuring fun facts about fashion designers, I love reading the off-the-wall fashion inspiration articles. They started off tame enough, with articles featuring inspiration from celebrities, models, films, and of course, Gossip Girl.

Where would we be without that show.

Anyway, so the fashion inspiration articles started reaching out to Disney characters and Nintendo characters. So why not Nickelodeon characters? Why not from one of my favorite animated shows, Hey Arnold!? Here's my version of the Fashion Inspiration: Hey Arnold! Femmes (product information not included)

Helga G. Pataki

This girl lives in the city and she is tough tomboy decked out in pink. Boots for the badass attitude, the pink dress and bow for her softer side, and don't forget that locket you carry around that holds the photo of your favorite football head.

Lila Sawyer

As a country girl, Lila is more conservative and girly than most of her peers who have lived in the city for all their young lives. You wouldn't be giving off the sweet country-girl vibe without some plaid and your favorite little bows.

Rhonda Wellington Lloyd

She's chic, she's snobby, she's all that -- Rhonda strikes me as a girl who would prefer something form-fitting; covering, but sexy. I added pearls to stand in for her white collar and emphasize her snootiness.

Phoebe Heyerdahl

Phoebe is shy and an intellectual, so even with this cute blue dress and adorable little flats, don't forget your book bag to hold all of your books (and Helga's homework that you'll be doing). Don't you love her blue frames?

Patricia "Big Patty" Smith

Patty, like Helga, is a tough girl with a sweet side. Again, bows for her courteous, kind nature; boots for stomping on people who are unnecessarily rude to her.

Ruth P. McDougal

Ruth is an "older woman" in Hey Arnold!, so I figured she'd wear something more mature than a simple dress or t-shirt. Still, she is a city gal and a sixth grader, so black sneakers for long walks at the Cheese Festival.

Nadine

A similar outfit to Patty's (how much fashion variation do fourth graders know anyway? Besides Rhonda.) but with little flats and bug earrings, as a tribute to her fascination with insects.

Sheena

I actually chose vegan-friendly jeans for this outfit. Sheena is totally a hipster vegan who very much enjoys peace and hugging trees than any kind of conflict. Don't forget your giant orange flower accessory. Don't like it? Well it might be because you're not a fourth grader.

---

Thoughts? If you like these, definitely check out CollegeFashion.net. They have a never-ending supply of affordable outfit ideas. If anything you should be impressed by my outfit making. Or find this amusing. Laughter does make the world go 'round...

**If you're dying to know where one of these products are from, just comment and I'll post you the link. I don't want to be TOO much like CF.net.

Really, everything from Middle school is Embarrassing.

2011-03-28T03:16:00.007-04:00

A while ago I called up the horrifically embarrassing little tales I had written when I was younger and once again, my awkward past came up again in a Facebook chat as my friend Noah and I started discussing what we had read in middle school. We English majors have our origins and not all of them are as studious and glorious as they can be imagined...

Noah shared that he read a book called On the Run, a book about a Southerner's journey up north, fishing and soul searching. Clearly, this is a story I can picture that captured his own interests as a reader and boy living in Virginia. This was a legitimate book.

I say that because when I started thinking about the books I read in middle school, I read legitimate books of absolute frivolity. I mean, I suppose I was reading literature in my classes that I resented and pouted over on the sheer fact it was indeed homework and this might be why I had turned to such ridiculous reads.

Well, twelve year olds are ridiculous anyways, but still -- I should have known better, you know? Shouldn't I have been reading classics like Jane Austen, J.R.R. Tolkien and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle like proper young intellectuals? If I was doing it in class, it didn't stick until I was older.

You know what stuck? James Howe's The Watcher (respectable; I learned about multiple perspective narrating), David and Leigh Eddings'The Redemption of Althalus (still pretty respectable), Lynne Ewing's Daughters of the Moon series, (Um...) and -- Francine Pascal's Fearless series.

Yikes.

I take pause to Fearless because when I went to go reminisce about this series I was utterly infatuated with, the Wikipedia article was alarmingly extensive. I was made fun of because my more intellectual peers at Renbrook teased me for reading such smut since the first two or three books focused on the raging hormones of teenagers. However, if smart, mature readers can get past those volumes, (I breezed through them, naturally) the story gets outrageously complicated and heavy. It was as if Francine was getting her kicks out of the way writing about silly high school relationships then BAM, the CIA, Russian spies and murders of regular characters are plot pillars. What people should have been making fun of me for was how ludicrous the whole concept was.

Here is the LONG biography provided from the in-depth Wiki article on Fearless about it's main character, Gaia Moore:

Initially Gaia is lonely and bitter, and feels ostracized from her fellow classmates (whom she considers inferior and intellectually lacking) and frequently skips school to play chess at the park or to walk around the city sightseeing. She is extremely educated and has a post graduate college level understanding on all her school subjects. At night she wanders around dangerous areas of the city and spends her time fighting criminals and helping people from robbers, murderers, rapists, etc. using her amazing martial arts skills.

After she uses her skills, or overtly exerts herself in any way, she experiences a blackout episode where she becomes unconscious for a short period of time. This is due to the enormous amount of stress that she puts on her body from using her unmatched physical skills. In order to compensate for her lack of fear, nature seems to have given Gaia's physical strength, reflexes, and stamina an enormous boost. Her lack of fear also means she has no restrictions placed on her muscles or on her endurance; she can tighten her muscles so much that her bones will break or easily lift up a car with her strength. As well as being in top physical condition, she has been trained for eight years in a variety of martial arts by her father who is part of the CIA. Gaia's favorite foods and meals consist of sugary sweets and junk food with many calories.

As the series progresses Gaia learns much about her past and develops emotionally to be much more open to people. At the beginning of the series her tragic past has left her scarred and vulnerable to the point that she has completely isolated herself from others. Throughout the series Gaia has a very negative and bitter personality, is constantly in a bad mood and can get angry very easily. She has experienced many hardships and is prone to have this negative and brutish personality and outlook because she is incapable of feeling fear and therefore has no sense of respect for others to make her act humble or well mannered. She also has low self esteem and is constantly unsatisfied with how she looks and is overtly critical of herself. She is said to have a toned and well muscled body, has light blond hair, and deep blue eyes,is around 5'10" and is considered exceptionally beautiful by everyone who sees her.

I hope you don't actually take the time to read it all, just skim it. But honestly: I feel like the high expectations I have for myself may extend a little from this...?

Also, could you take a moment to compare the fictional girl I loved reading about compared to, say, Bella Swan? Yes, both of them are attractive to every guy they meet (hey, what sells, sells) but does Bella hustle chess matches in her free time? Nope.

Anyway, I'm a better reader now, reading things like The Remains of the Day and Anil's Ghost, but we all have our favorite guilty pleasures.

Last ODACs game for me...hopefully not for them.

2011-02-26T12:30:00.004-05:00

Great job last night, everyone! Let's keep building our legacy!

***\o/***Roanoke College Cheerleading***\o/***

(click to zoom in!)

Marc Jacobs Twitter Scheme: My Emotional Rollercoaster

2011-02-17T18:11:00.019-05:00

I had first heard about it on Monday in my Senior English seminar class from my peer, @StephColpo.
"You'll appreciate this, Liz," she said. I got my Bedford Anthology out of my Marc by Marc Jacobs bowling bag (green lettering). "What's up?"

"Marc Jacobs is doing this thing on Twitter where he's going to offer job interviews to whoever can send the funniest tweet."
I had never heard of a lazier but brilliant application process.
"Like, what kind of funny tweets?" Fashion related? NYC related? Vegatable puns?
"He didn't say, just whatever's really witty."

Since it sounded so effortless, I couldn't resist but jump on this bandwagon of insanity. Witty tweets? As many as I want? It was like this was made for me. People told me I was funny all the time. For gits and shiggles I started half-heartedly sending tweets to MarcJacobsIntl.

"What I love most about NYC is that no matter how much I work, no matter how much money I make, I always feel worthless." @MarcJacobsIntl

I can only jokingly write "I'm the next best thing" on cover letters so many times til I acutally forget to delete it. @MarchJacobsIntl

(I'm aware that one is really lame)

Sometimes the apple falls from the tree and realizes SOMEONE TOOK THE ORANGE JOKE. @MarcJacobsIntl

(This one is irrelevant unless you know that I had given @StephColpo a saying I had made up: "Sometimes the apple falls from the tree and finds out it's an orange". Again, lame.)

At this point the tweets are pretty loosey-goosey, not very serious, clearly just putting my foot in the pool of young people who don't want to go through an application process and just get hired to tweet all day.

However, the idea of getting hired to work in the fashion industry started eating at me and my tweets became a little more desperate. Thus the bargaining stage began.
I tried the basic "hire me!" tweets (which is NOT what MJ was particularly looking for...) and other embarrassing tactics, mostly for shock value.

Dear @MarcJacobsIntl, even if you don't choose my witty tweets, I'll still haunt every fax machine in your office with my resume. Cheers.

Dinner conversation lulls are depressing when you can't share the time you got caught knitting in a gentlemen's club. @MarcJacobsIntl

@MarcJacobsIntl "We had a caravan until my mom blew the tranny in a ditch." @ineberated meant "transmission". Still a legit reason though.

Seriously @MarcJacobsIntl, I can handle the stressful job! I have Asian lineage meaning if I'm not stressed + handling it, I'm probably dead.

Around this time I was getting a little perturbed that I wasn't immediately standing out from the bazillion of tweets MJ was probably getting hourly. How could they not see my tweets and realize I was brilliant? I'm funny, dammit! Most of these people are probably just bimbos who own a shirt or watch from him and think they can work in the fast-paced grueling world of fashion. I'm ambitious. I'm articulate. And I am witty. I wasn't going to take this any longer. Just because I'm considered a chunky size four in the fashion world doesn't mean they can also determine that I am not funny enough.

As such, my tweets became belligerent, especially when I came across the cover of Glamour's 1991 May issue for my mini-research project. The cover featured Ebba Elmer in a bright yellow Marc Jacobs for Perry Ellis swimsuit accompanied by a heinous lampshade disguised as a hat.

Hey @MarcJacobsIntl just saw your Perry Ellis swimsuit on Elmer for Glamour cover '91. Still have that hat? [pic]

@MarcJacobsIntl if you're still looking for the hat, it's probably serving as a lampshade. [pic]

I even lashed out at people who teased the masses for participating in this rat race.

TheSlushBlog: "@MarcJacobsIntl congratulations on the largest marketing plot in twitter history. #every1else congratulations on making fools of yourselves.

to which I replied:

@TheSlushBlog @MarcJacobsIntl I'd be more offended if your username wasn't "slushblog". It just boasts elitist attitude.

The anger ebbed away and I began to become more fascinated with how obsessed I was with this thing. This caused anxiety.

I really need to stop this @MarcJacobsIntl tweeting but I just CAN'T until I KNOW that someone else got the job. HIRE SOMEONE AND END MY STRESS.

Anxiety was soon replaced by a more conversational tone, as though pretending I was on a level with MJ now to start discussing this whole ordeal.

@MarcJacobsIntl I'm starting to think this is a ruse to get ppl to worship you even more than usual. Is ANYONE following the rules?

How did anyone get hired anywhere before the internet? Before Twitter? Hard work and character building? @MarcJacobsIntl

Just when I thought I was easing out of this addiction, it flared up again when my friend @PennyinaBottle thought it would be funny to remind me I had a serious problem. I barked back at his taunt:

Thought: since YOU'RE so damn witty, why don't YOU tweet @MarcJacobsIntl, @PennyinaBottle? IfyouwinI'llcutyoubtwkawesome.

PennyinaBottle: @LeParkette rational thought: Me, work for a FASHION company? What not to wear thought I was too big of a project.

Nevertheless, I found caught him following Marc Jacobs twitter. For moment in lacking reason and rationality, I felt threatened.

@MarcJacobsIntl if you offer @PennyinaBottle a job interview for a single tweet of his, you're just spiting me. Seriously.

I was later alerted to this:

PennyinaBottle: @MarcJacobsIntl, I tweet, therefore I spite @LeParkette

That was the final straw. I couldn't participate in this anymore. I was emotionally exhausted and decided to retreat back to job searching, to filling out actual applications and writing cover letters more than 140 characters.

While this application process caused me a lot of inner turmoil once I got caught up in it, in the end it was kind of fun having my role in this Marc Jacobs craze. I was brainwashed into thinking I actually connected with MJ like a love-sick school girl who thinks the guy next to her in Spanish class secretly loves her because he must have known her favorite color was red when he wore that scarlet t-shirt.

Since my retirement, my head has cleared up and humility has settled back in, fully reminding me I am just another 20-something woman in a sea of the Next Big Things. If I'm not recognized for my amazing potential in a Twitter contest, how else will I succeed in my career goals? Oh right. The old fashioned way of proving my academic and job credentials. Yikes.

Pictures from 1991 January Glamour

2011-01-30T16:10:00.009-05:00

Pages 116-117, 118-119, and 122-123 from 1991 Glamour magazine (January).

Photographed by Hiromasa.

Dos and Don'ts from January 1991 issue of Glamour.

I like the shades of grey - notice anything missing? (Celebrities?)

For these pictures' relevance, check out my 101st post and compare them to the Dos and Dont's for January 2011!

***All pictures were hastily taken from the Roanoke College Glamour Archive Jan-June 1991 volume 89 (Missing March, April) by me. None of these are for profit. If they were, I would've started doing this years ago. And a much better job of doing it.

101st Post! January Glamour issues 1991 and 2011

2011-01-30T15:04:00.016-05:00

Besides that my images are too small to read (pft, just zoom in why don't you) and that I switched the color of the font according to the year, this sloppily put-together mess is an attempt to show comparisons between the 1991 January issue of Glamour compared to the 2011 issue - twenty years later. If my laptop wasn't (STILL.) broken and I didn't have schoolwork, this would be much more professional and nice looking.

My next post will feature pictures from the Glamour 1991 magazine - but not the 2011. If you want to see the pictures that go with the photo shoots and Dos and Donts, then just buy the magazine. Duh.

I'll see if I can improve my execution for the February issue comparison.

Hope you find this interesting!

New Project = not smart

2011-01-25T16:46:00.002-05:00

Even though my brain is telling me that this is a bad idea, I started a new project.

Since I have my new shiny subscription to Glamour, I found the Glamour archives (I had tweeted about it a while ago) and decided it would be need to compare the the Glamour issues from 1991 to the current ones and see how much things have changed in twenty years!

I will be posting it here, but I haven't really figured out a method of putting them side-by-side for optimum comparison analysis.

Oh well. At least my mini-presentations for my other classes are out of the way.

And what is the point of having a crispy chicken sandwich for lunch if it doesn't keep you full for five hours??

Oh well.

Plain Ol' Frustration.

2011-01-17T18:54:00.004-05:00

So I'm back in a class once again filled with exasperated girls who text and guys whom I'd only recognize slung over a toilet in their own sick. I haven't had a class like this since...well...I can't really remember because it was SO LONG AGO that I was in a classroom where a majority of the students acted like a snot-nosed high schoolers who'd rather be slurping alcohol with mysterious body fluids than live up to what some people might mistake them for "adults".

I felt bad for the professor. He was a really nice guy who seemed very excited to start teaching something he was really passionate about. No one answered basic questions (unless it involved the half-assed "hand raise") and were blatantly disrespectful to the teacher.

Come ON guys, we're in COLLEGE. Most of you who are acting like this are the BIG KIDS of the class and should at least pretend to be adults at this point.

Honestly? These are probably the same girls who don't flush.

This city's made us crazy...

2011-01-17T18:42:00.002-05:00

and we must get out.

Back at school with a much more optimistic outlook: graduation is on the horizon! I will not only survive this semester, but will pass through it like a Lisa Frank unicorn prancing on a rainbow! Life WILL be better because of my attitude!

I was greeted back to school with a birthday basket containing Cheetos, Dunkeroos, two flasks of rum and a Lisa Frank coloring book (suddenly the simile makes sense!) among other fun things, as well as a tiny school mailbox stuffed with three Glamour magazines and a complimentary make-up travel case! Thank you, big sister, it's a wonderful birthday gift on top of the hand-me-downs you gave me!

More good news: got my black pants back. This is a personal victory.

Bad news is that I'm back in an environment where my sick fascination with attire is ridiculed. However, the whole concept of blogging, which seems to mystify and thus anger southern men, has become the new method of making-fun-of-Liz.

My conversation with a friend on Facebook chat just inspired me to write a rant but I'll make a new post for that.

What's the point.

2011-01-15T11:46:00.002-05:00

Life back at college without a laptop is utterly futile. If I wasn't an Engilsh major, a contributing writer for CollegeFashion.net, trying to work things out for an internship this semester, or trying to get ready for my last semester at Roanoke in general, this probably wouldn't be such an issue.

But it is. And - of course - I am only able to use this computer because I'm waiting for the bookstore to open. Hooray for public computers.

Pray for the quick and safe return of my laptop to me once it's fixed.

GUH.

Ambition and my cat.

2011-01-03T02:09:00.003-05:00

"My New Year resolutions include being more forward-thinking
and active about my dreams of working as an editor in a publishing company or as
a part of the editorial staff for a fashion magazine. As such, I'm going to make
an effort to buy less frivolous party clothes for frat parties and attempt to
purchase more items that I will more likely be wearing after college." - 1/3/10

There was also something about updating with Forever 21 outfits but that seemed a little silly.

I feel as though I succeeded in that resolution, seeing as I now have (so many) more neutrals in my wardrobe and I achieved in getting an office editorial internship in NYC for Joonbug and snagged a contributing writing position with CollegeFashion last minute before the year ended.

Resolutions for 2011 seem simpler, since college life is coming to an end.

Basic Goals:

-Graduate Roanoke College

-Get a job (in editorial? Media? Advertising even??)

-Avoid gaining weight

-Become an absolute master of Photoshop/any image warping program

I feel like those aren't asking too much, but the economy, I'm sure, will prove otherwise.

Fun Goals:

-Try one of those Fashion Challenges.

-Make the most of any vacation, no matter how brief it is or how desolate the destination may be.

-Learn to knit a legitimate sweater.

That's all I got for now. Here's an old picture of my cat who - in every literal sense - provides more fascinating conversation than my bulldog.

I suppose you wouldn't believe me if you've never heard the innumerable sassy tones of "meow" that can mean exasperation, impatience, or half-hearted approval (among other things).

NICE.

2010-12-25T23:13:00.002-05:00

Most people know that Christmases tend to fluctuate with the quality of presents: sometimes you know that your parents had no idea what to get you, your siblings and relatives bought the first thing that popped out to them and you end up returning things. Sometimes you get such great gifts that you never asked for but are so happy you got them.

This was one of those Christmases.

My parents finally caved and got me a digital camera, apparently thinking that I have learned my lesson when I last broke one in seventh grade. I am not making this up. Bonus: it doesn't come with a memory card! The road to digital memories and visual artistry continues.

Every year it seems I get a blank journal, but my sister gave me a Pride and Prejudice and Zombies themed journal. It's complete with the PPZ cover picture and intricate Victorian interior stationary occasionally stained with meticulously drawn in bloodstains. Clever and gothic!

My brother got me a freaking Kindle and even though I never really considered ever owning one it is AWESOME and I have already done the irresponsible thing and downloaded Scrabble for less thatn three dollars. However, once my last semester (ever) gets started, I'm sure it's actual purpose and usefulness will begin to reveal itself. I still intend on buying books but the ones I need purely for college will be nice to have on the Kindle.

Now that I have a camera, I'm very excited at the opportunity to start this blog FRESH and have the motivation to use VISUALS A LOT, hopefully to enhance stories about things that happen in my life that I deem noteworthy and/or amusing.

All I need is a memory card and get my stupid laptop fixed.

Merry Christmas to everyone!

Whoa.

2010-12-17T01:44:00.001-05:00

This evening, I learned how to crotchet from my neighbor Rachel N.

Watch out.

Finals finished and digging for DIYs

2010-12-16T21:08:00.002-05:00

First, I do not know where this has been all my life, but: WTForever21 has now become a scholarly reference that confirms the mistakes Forever21 produces.

But please continue producing cute, cheap clothes, F21. Everyone has their faults, but we still love you. Lots. Also, **Congrats to my friend who is now one of the few, the proud, the strong, elite members of the Forever21 sales staff!**

Since finals is over and studying is no longer necessary of me for a few precious weeks, the creative outlet has been bursting so I started slow with the virtual ugly Christmas sweater website, where one can design their own hideous sweater (but sadly never purchase it).

I have started knitting Fortinbras's sweater but since I've been turning my laptop on in short intervals before the fan goes off, I've been able to start rummaging the internet for possibly DIY projects. Faux fur booties are something I might make with less outrageous faux-pelt choice, I need to find a fashionista friend who would sport a camel cape since capes aren't really my thing, and I kind of would like to try making this again after my first attempt at a Sunday morning RC crafts. This is a lot of work but looks like a fun thing to do on a winter day (I'd probably do the binder over the cork board since most of my friends are moving out of dorms and will be living in real places soon).

In any case, creative juices must start flowing and these will certainly help jump-start them!

This is my last winter break. Ever. :(

NEWS. Further procrastination.

2010-12-14T14:57:00.003-05:00

I was opening Confronting Appalachian Stereotypes when as I flipped passed page 62, a piece of paper sat there waiting to be snooped on.

I don't know if it was meant to be left in there (that's my vote) or if it was just a bookmark, but here is what was on that piece of paper:

What is so great about this is that my gut tells me this HAS to be from someone in my class because who else is picking up books on Appalachian stereotypes? My disappointment would be momumental if this was from Cindy Whatsherface '97.

If you are the person who wrote this or know who did, please own up. I would be so happy.

Two tests to go!

2010-12-14T14:43:00.003-05:00

Just kidding, I still have a page or two left in my paper for Appalachian literature but I'm going to tick it off anyway to make me feel like I'm closer to accomplishing my academic duties. While my paper on Appalachian stereotypes as represented in children's shows is interesting because I get to watch Hey Arnold! and the Simpsons, it is still a paper that need to be written to academic standards and that requires a lot of thinking. And stuff. SIGH.

The thinking and stuff will continue until Thursday and so I guess I should go back to work.

I also need to really start brainstorming Cracked article ideas. Yikes.

Life is impossible without a laptop.

2010-12-09T16:15:00.004-05:00

"Oh Liz," Reason tells me, shaking its head with half-hearted grin. "You have the library computers to help you out! That's why you're able to update your blog right now."

I tell Reason to shut its face because I have been in this library since ten o'clock. To be fair, I started writing at eleven. I only have two pages to go for my paper that's due tomorrow, but I've been looking at computer screens for so long that my eye-sight is getting blurry and my brain is mushy like it died and went to Nolan's Inception limbo.

"Well take a break!" Reason insists, with that condenscending tone. "Walk away! Go outside! Go to the gym for an hour and clear your head!"

ZOMG why didn't I think of that? Oh that's right, because after nine o'clock tonight the library will be booked and I won't be able to find a computer to finish my paper! Why nine o' clock? Because I have work at 6:00pm to 9:00pm and I am booked solid with six writing tutorials, so I get to look forward to staring at MORE font size twelve papers.

There's really only one thing left to do: weasel in whatever stuff I have left in my mushy brain within the next half hour, go to dinner, go to work, then pray there's a computer available in the library. If not, pass out on bed, wake up very early and finish said paper.

Ta da!

Note worthy study time.

2010-12-05T18:43:00.003-05:00

Since I've been in the library, the soccer player at his computer has been rather quiet and jamming silently, swaying his head forward, chin first and mouthing the words to himself, respecting the study space for his peers.

It wasn't until I was reading about reshifts and quasars in William C. Mitchell's Bye Bye Big Bang: Hello Reality (he's from CT and an alumn from UCONN), that suddenly I hear a whisper "break down". I paused. Looking up, everyone is still typing, focused on their work. More things are whispered. The soccer player is quietly whispering lyrics to whatever song he's listening to -- I'm guessing every other line. He continued this for several minutes. I enjoyed the silly distraction from my work and I would have taken more amusement out of it if he was listening to a song I knew because then I would have whispered the lyrics he was missing. Teamwork, people!

Emergency Public Announcement. Or blog post.

2010-12-04T14:36:00.003-05:00

This is so urgent I had to take a break from my three straight hours of astronomy research and writing.

Because I am a good citizen, I flushed a stranger's poop.

Roanoke College girls are disgusting. Don't compare them to boys. Just don't. When it comes to excrement, most boys keep it around because if it's "impressive", it marks the perpetrator's manliness. They take amusement from poop. Girls don't. They are lazy. They are lazy, vile and possibly, simply put, stupid. They don't follow the golden rule; they don't take into account that other femmes do not wish to see the evidence of someone else using the library bathroom previously.

Society has gone through great lengths to make sure that humans do not have to go through a lot of "work" to do gross jobs. Garbage disposals with the flick of a switch, how-to guides to train your cat to go on a toilet to avoid messy litter box cleaning, and even automatic flushers for potties. (Pottys? English language tells me otherwise.)

Roanoke College does not have automatic flushers. Because of this, some students consider Roanoke as "ghetto". Poor souls are forced to take responsibility to turn around, sometimes come to terms of what just came out of them, and actually perform a simple function to make that stuff go away. Crisis!

This ordeal happened when I was taking a break from researching redshifts and dark matter to go to the bathroom in the bottom floor of the library. Glancing into the stalls, I was hoping to go into the first one to answer Nature's call. Unfortunately, the first stall was too busy housing one tiny poo, floating sadly, most likely embarrassed of being seen. I went in the second stall and afterwards, decided it would be the good Episcopalian act to flush the ugly little thing away.

I have heard multiple stories from my friends (I hang with a "make sure it went down the drain" crew) about disgusting habits of Roanoke girl bathrooms. Basic unflushed toilet paper, drunk-induced vomit messes left for days, and [men, avert thine eyes] used condoms hanging out freely in the porcelain bowl.

Girls, what is wrong with you? I'm not even going to refer to them as "women's" stalls because I'm sure everyone reading this has seen children's restrooms in better condition (although, that may be due to the fact that they have not started going through puberty yet). Nevertheless, please just take a moment to stop worrying about replying to that text message from your one-night stand and before you leave the bathroom to pick up your phone, PLEASE just take a moment to flush. Or just put a kitty litter box in your room to spare us your vile waste. Swine.

YAAAY!

2010-12-02T11:28:00.004-05:00

I have been chosen to be a contributing writer for CollegeFashion.net for Spring semester 2011!

In celebration, here's a picture.

Bursts of inspiration are often followed by immediate sleep intervals.

2010-12-02T01:17:00.004-05:00

My cousin introduced me to the twisted world of Allie Brosh a few days back and within that short period my time spent on doing actual things as plummeted. I found the best way to handle this situation is to take my entire Seminar class down with me by introducing them to the blog so that if I can't study for the upcoming exam, then no one can.

It's amazing what inspiration can do. After reading a lot of her stories and ell oh elling (Noah corrected me: "I think you mean 'lawling'.") at her silly drawings, I proceeded to add her to blogs I routinely creep on and got the motivation to finally apply to be a writer for Cracked.com. Rejection is imminent, but by golly I tried!

I realized after surveying the blogs I read, it occurred to me that I don't do a lot of "correct" things that successful blogs do: I rarely use visual aids, I purposefully write about stuff no one cares about (scroll down for "oxford shoes" paragraph) and I don't advertise frequently. Also known as "at all".

Maybe I'll never be as funny or well known as Ms. Brosh but her blog certainly helped inspire me. I really really hoped everyone clicked that link up there so that when Noah and I look at each other with panicked expressions and start going "eeeeeeeeeee" during our exam, then fewer people will think we're bat-shit insane. And possibly join in.

My blog! When you could be doing something else!

2010-11-28T19:06:00.003-05:00

I don't know why it always bothers me when someone admits to reading my blog. I know it's posted for the world to see, but for some reason when someone asks me to update my blog or comments on something I had blogged about earlier, it's...just...weird. Perhaps in my fanciful world, I expected that the people who would read my blog would be nameless strangers I would never meet or talk to. Then again, those kinds of people who read my blog and find it interesting are the people I should worry about.

But nonetheless.

Thanks to my sister I finally have a chance to try out these Oxford flats. Dark brown, crocodile patterned, and flat, I'm excited to work them into my wardrobe. However, they'll never fill the gap in my heart since the loss of the F21 shiny black Oxford high heeled booties. Sob sob

Legitimate things to sob about include the upcoming slaughter of exams and projects within the next three weeks, the discovery of lizard leashes, and my financial struggle for appropriate Christmas gifts. Perhaps I can work overtime at the Writing Center...?

But seriously, this iguana leash issue can be thanked to a night of nothing on TV and my morbid curiosity of what pet lovers are purchasing during this recession. "Your Pet Wants this Too" is essentially a string of reformatted infomercials advertising the most frivolous accessories your pet needs. "Now I can take my parakeet anywhere!" brags the woman with the mesh bird cage backpack, strapped to her shoulders. But where? Where are you taking Tweety? Tweety does not need to hang out and bother your cubicle neighbors. Tweety does not need to accompany you to the bar. Leave your bird home.

Things that are entirely necessary include the hamster litter box, fashion for ferrets, and edible dog bubbles. I enjoyed the insanity of it all so much I cannot wait for the next episode. The punchline to all of these things? The price tags. There are people who have money; they just complain about not having enough.

A while ago I decided to lean more towards English fashion than American because of some inspirational articles from CF such as this one and this one and other websites I don't feel like digging up and linking. I often day-dream of returning to England (Anne: I still do that with China) and I like its themes of minimalism and classic style.

Dear friends: I am taking a pause from knitting scarves for other people, as I am now taking steps in learning how to knit a sweater for Fortinbras.

Poo-poo.

Scarves will continued to be knitted after said project is done. In the meantime, remain patient and insanely jealous of my dog.

And to finish off...

Christmas Wish List:

-New glasses (preferably horn-rimmed or generic Clark Kent style)

-Digital Camera

-Colorful mini skirts to brighten up my wardrobe

-Darkmans by Nicola Barker to add to my Gothic literature collection

Reminiscing and laughing hysterically at myself. Good fun.

2010-11-16T00:22:00.003-05:00

It began with a friend asking me about a story we had read online at Fictionpress.com. I promised her I'd look for it on my old account and send it to her. I had not accessed my FP accounts in years. I mean years. Not two or three. Like five or six.

I sent her the link and proceeded to browse the stories I had written in middle school and a few meager posts from high school. Wow. The stories from middle school are very embarrassing. Further proof that nothing from middle school years other than academic files should be documented on the internet. Or anywhere.

I reread a few stories of mine and laughed hysterically, to the point of tears. What was I thinking? That's the only question one can keep asking over and over again when reflecting on a time when you knew everything and were just sooo cool. At least, in your own, tiny world. In my small social scene, I was convinced I was awesome because people read my stories and liked them. I can't blame myself entirely because the readers are also guilty of ever thinking my written works were good.

The stories, dialogue, and characters were just thinly veiled people and daydreams I had in my life (it's like I didn't even try). Tons of things were nicked from other books I had read, shows I watched, and of course, real life conversations I had with my fellow precocious preteen friends. Because I didn't know what an editing process was, there are tons of mistakes that were overlooked because of my imaginary high demand for new chapters. There are so many laughable things about how naive I was: I tried to write about edgy things like sex and alcohol, which I clearly knew nothing about since I went to a sheltered, private middle school, khakis and all. The fact I named a Connecticut school "Huwiki High" was blatantly inferring my liking of anime. Most of the girls were extremes, either ridiculously aggressive and angry all the time or so very shy to the point of being angelic mutes. The guys were fashioned from love interests I read about in teen novels and my own preferences that I hoped to find in a boyfriend; it's hilarious because I ended up dating guys like that in high school. Sad or funny, take your pick.

Ugh, I even did profiles for my characters like they do (did?) in a lot of shoujo manga. Taking a walk down nerd memory lane makes me laugh and feel horrifically embarrassed, but it also helped me see how far I had come as a writer (trust, it was a long way up) and as a person overall. I refuse to post the link to my Fictionpress profile on my blog, but if you happen to have it or find it, have fun and remember: I was in middle school. I knew nothing and wrote about everything.

One more post before November...

2010-10-31T21:30:00.002-04:00

Happy Halloween -- even though I celebrated last night, I suppose I might as well write a post giving cheers to everyone. Halloween really is one of the best holidays, I think. I enjoy dressing up, carving pumpkins and watching The Nightmare Before Christmas.

It's so bizarre to think last year I was at a club wearing just black pants, a black shirt and a cat mask in England -- a land where traditional Halloween attire for women doesn't immediately entail "sexy". In case you haven't seen the pictures (or didn't "get" it), I was the Devil Wears Prada. I was far more stylish than those other she-devils running around in just devil horns. Victory is mine.

The season of being fat is here! It's so exciting. Hooray for sweaters. Speaking of which, I have a specific DIY in mind for my next project (seeing as I have not been knitting in my free time lately) and when I've finished it I'll post...pictures. Or something.

My pillow pet unicorn Fonzie has settled in well. I adore his fluffiness and gladly promote the purchasing of pillow pets.

I'm looking forward to my weekend trip to Baltimore (unlike many of my peers) for a Writing Center conference. I told Brittany I plan on wearing absolutely outrageous outfits the entire time just to be a pain. Hurrah! I'm so bored here.

Fortune cookie on 10/30/10: "Life is a series of choices. Todays yours are good ones."

And then I remembered I had a blog...

2010-10-07T02:12:00.006-04:00

I was about to post my late-night thought of the week as a Facebook note, but Zuckerburg's new-age wheel has been turning so friggin' slowly that I became frustrated and went to Blogspot instead. To add to my irritation, my delete button is being fussy so I have to jab violently with my finger in order for it to serve its basic function. Insert employee joke here.

Tonight I was catching up on Gossip Girl (and immediately read the Vulture's recap of the episode!) and since I wasn't done knitting, I chose to give Greek another chance by watching season 3 on Hulu. I mean, it's a shallow, ridiculous teen dramadey, what wouldn't I love about it?

Wrong. Greek's writers have an amazing talent to make me not care about anything going on in the show. Isn't that the job of TV script/idea writers? To pitch and deliver a show that makes one want to watch continuously? Why do I like Gossip Girl and Glee more than I care for those other TV shows available this season? Or the past few years?

(It's 2:00am, I will continue tomorrow on a keyboard that functions.)

Moving on.

I think I like Gossip Girl more than any other teen drama since the OC is because, well, they have a staff that's become so transparent to me I can often see past Nate and Serena and connect with the writers and the stylists, criticizing their lower moments and exalting in their success. Also, Blair Waldorf, like other GG characters, is real to me - her writers, her stylist, and Meester's acting makes Blair pop from other characters like Marissa Cooper and those 90210 girls.

There's more literary and cultural references in GG for all of the shallow, improbable subplots. They blatantly advertise high fashion and I love it. I appreciate GG for it's advertising savvy and addictiveness.

I know I'm an English major and I haven't taken any classes on media, communications or business, but I am learning advertising as a consumer. I'm aware that I'm craving Reese's Puffs at least once a week because of the brain-worm chant "Ree-sus Puffs, Ree-sus Puffs". I know I want to try a diet because the image has convinced me I'll get a tinier waist, a bigger bust, and a perfect complexion. I listen to my friends why they have a certain style, why a certain colored iPod defines them, why they buy the things they purchase, etc.

So as I set up my Linkedin and Monster accounts, I'm aware that it looks strange how I want to become involved in the advertising, publishing and media industries even though I've confirmed myself as an English major, specializing in British literature and creative writing. But employers, please give me the chance to prove I am the employee you've been waiting for. I'm not an English major to be a teacher. I'm an English major because it hones my ability to soak in a lot of information from both skimming and learning intensively. It teaches me to communicate thoughts clearly to various audiences, avoiding misunderstandings and confusion. It teaches me to research like a scientist, look back and learn from the past like a historian, understand and analyze motives like a psychologist, and appreciate various forms of expression like an artist. English majors learn these disciplines and I know I could apply all of them in the career I'm aiming for.

Shout out to Meredith, whom I told should work for the CIA.

She told me she wants to be a nanny.

Kate Nash

2010-09-25T00:26:00.003-04:00

And even though when I take you out, you've got me -- you've got me standing in an awkward position with unwanted attention and a need for explanation...I could, I could never let you go

And that is all I know.

Reflections on...stuff.

2010-09-20T00:21:00.002-04:00

I'm pretty sure it was around this time last year I was moving into my room at UEA as an exchange student. God, I was such a mess over there -- eating mostly (only?) canned fruit, struggling as the only student in my Chaucer class who didn't take Medieval literature (and therefore didn't know what she was reading), wandering aimlessly on busses and around downtown Norwich kind of sums up my first week there. I remember so many of my friends back home telling me how scared they'd be if they had to go to a country all by themselves for three months, but it's really not that bad; you just need to put yourself out there and hope you don't wind up mugged or dead (or stalked?). I mean, if the worst thing is someone thinks you're weird (instead of hilarious, since you know you are) when you're taking a risk in meeting people, then yes, England would have been a much scarier place to be.

October was the month of people telling me how not dangerous England was. At first, I didn't want to travel anywhere by myself, but then my flatmates reasoned, "Well you're already in a country by yourself, you might as well travel a train ride trip by yourself." So I did, and in case you didn't remember, a lot of things went wrong but through divine intervention or incredible luck, I came back unscathed. Multiple times.

I really miss England sometimes, but I am aware that I miss the lifestyle just a little more. It was the first time I was on my own, with time to read and enjoy the reading material (when I say reading material, I really mean the Gothic Literature class assignments, not Chaucer) and the money to travel, eat, shop, and party. Don't get me wrong, I was totally broke when I got back for Spring semester '10, but when I was in England, I was financially comfortable...and I had to be since I was not allowed to get a job while I was there. :P

Getting on a train or bus and go whenever, wherever I could afford is such a distant memory now.

There are times when I think about what would have happened if I had been a regular American student at UEA like Philly -- I don't think I would have acted the same. I knew of my time constraint in England, so I was more bold, spontaneous, and outrageous than I usually am. There's only four or five people I'll probably ever see again in my lifetime so if the snotty San Fransisco hippy in my poetry class disapproves of my poem, what do I care?

Since I'll never be that free or financially comfortable again in my life, I would have to say travelling abroad to UEA was one of the best things I've ever done in my young adult life (possibly life, I haven't lived that long yet). If I ever had the opportunity to go to England and visit my friends at UEA again, I would do it in a heartbeat.

Maybe I'll just move to England after college. I'd just have to do a lot a lot of work to do that, a lot more than I did to be an exchange student there. Like, step one, get permission to have a job there...

Hm.

2010-09-11T23:31:00.003-04:00

While the new swanky set up of my dorm room is impressive, the placement of my bed sacrifices a lot of my comfort during this season because it is parked right next to the vents. So even on a cold, wet evening like this one, the AC is BLASTING and I have to arrange barriers to keep it less cold when I try to sleep at night. Anyone who knows me will tell you I despise being cold when I'm indoors. Cold belongs outside, not inside, unless it's 100 degrees F or higher outdoors.

Freezing aside, my camping trip was another endurance test of my college career and I passed, seeing as I came back being familiar with a few more faces at the Writing Center and that I was not attacked by a bear or large snake, and I never fell asleep during meeting time that took place from 10:00 to 3:30pm today. Yay me!

Also, to everyone whom I've shared my Halloween costume -- it's not going to be Mad Hatter. Nay, I am doing a DIY costume (compliments to my sister's ingenuity) and I highly doubt anyone else will have it at Roanoke College campus. Victory number two.

Still working on victory number three becauseI'm still freezing from the AC vents just sitting here. Gaaah! More barriers!

The finishing of my third (and most stylish!) scarf is coming at hand. I'm aiming to finish it before October and while that seems like an awful long time to do it, keep in mind I have actual academic assignments that need to be done first. >_>

My calendar gets more and more full with due dates, group meetings and cheerleading duties which means senior year will be going by faster than I expected. October break seems right around the corner already and I have so much to do! That's why I write in my blog instead.

Food for thought: when wearing knee-high boots and a large, button-down shirt (with leggings, skinny jeans, tights, etc), I've learned that it is unwise to pair a waist-belt with the look because...well...I looked a bit like a modern pirate. But preppier. Just saying.

Youtube will be the death of me.

2010-09-09T21:57:00.003-04:00

No, really. It's a miracle I get all of my reading done. Scientifically, due to episodes of TV shows on YouTube, I should not be passing my classes with anything higher than a C- because of the time I waste on that damn website. It jus ain' right.

However, when I am reading, sometimes it's enjoyable. So far, reading Appalachian Literature assignments are fun because I like to sound out the dialect of Appalachian characters that are strongly stereotyped as illiterate hillbillies. I read The Star in the Valley this evening and reading it out loud helped me a) figure out what points I should get because I had to dig through the over-the-top flowery language that this author uses to contrast with the b) simple, chopped up dialect of Appalachian English that makes me snicker sometimes when I try to pronounce it out loud. Soon I will have a proper Appalachian accent added to my library of voice impersonations. And by library I really mean, like, seven in total.

Reading detective novels reminds me of reading for my Gothic genre class at UEA so they're easy and breezy. It's really just down to Seminar and Astronomy which might be the death of me.

Oh wait, that's Youtube's fault. Argh!

Also, I'm going camping this weekend with my peers at the Writing Center (UPDATE: I am a writing tutor) and apparently there's a bear threat on the campsite.

I'm also a part of another blog called Tutors Gone Wild - it started this month but trust, it will grow. I'm not giving you the link - just search for it if you really care to find out what it's about.

Yay camping...?

Dear Freshmen Girls

2010-09-07T20:51:00.004-04:00

Dear Freshmen Girls (of Roanoke College),

Lucky you! Girls all over campus will be vying for you to join their team/organization/but most likely sorority. Quick! Join one before you feel like a total outcast!

But in all seriousness, you're going to hear some nasty things about other groups of girls and you might think that's because the girl group that's sharing these nasty details wants you. That, sadly, is not always so. Girls will say horrible things just so that no one will want to join a particular group.

I'm just going to lay it out for you: there are sororities and teams and organizations you'll hear about that are "total sluts", "catty backstabbers", and "coke whores". Unfortunately, there's probably a little truth to every single one of those attacks; one or two (or twelve) girls can ruin the entire reputation of a group because of their poor choices.

I once talked to one of my friends that's in the Greek system and she told me how she didn't like doing Rush events because everyone is so fake. A girl who is boasting of her good family background and well-cultured lifestyle might leave out that she prefers to only drink to the point of vomiting every night.

On the flip side, a shy, sweet looking girl might get overlooked because she's considered "boring". A rumor can tarnish a promising recruit because of a few jealous girls who spread it.

Girls who are greeting you into a team/organization/(mostly) sorority also might leave out the hazing details, such as pelting you with raw eggs (don't act like that's secret) or humiliating you in general.

I just want to let you know that from my experience at this small school. Roanoke is a small school -- the competition for recruits is brutal. I am not bashing sororities. I'm just peeved that there are students on campus who are so aggressive in competing for new girls sink so low into spreading rumors like the ones I listed above (par. 3) and unfortunately, it is mainly sorority girls.

Sororities are great opportunities. They help girls learn leadership, help introverted girls come out of their shells, help networking and lots of other things. At least, that's what they did for my older sister, my friend at Lynchburg and several of my friends at Roanoke. But like any all-girl group, there is a dark side and you need to be wary of it.

I'm mainly writing this because of the things I've heard being said about the cheerleading squad, with people telling girls not to try out because "they're sluts" and "they, like, totally suck." Roanoke Cheerleading is doing its best to improve and become something that helps boost school spirit for its athletic departments, as well be an opportunity for students to be a part of something they love...or learn to love. I'm not even going to address the "slut" comments because those are from low, catty people who are jealous/bored/have low-self esteem.

My advice: go to meet and greets with no prejudices in mind. If you're going to think a group of girls are not for you, let your first impression decide. Not some other girls that you've known for two weeks.

Good luck on your first year of college.

Your peer,

Elisabeth

P.S. To the girls who talk shit: Seriously, just leave us alone. We'll do the same for you. Just do your thing and let me do mine.

A gentle reminder of why I attend one party a month...

2010-09-05T16:07:00.002-04:00

Friday night concluded why I should only attend one Roanoke College party a month. The Roanoke College parties I attended the one night in August were passable on the "fun" scale and upon leaving 308, I had wished I had saved my September night partying for another time in the month.

It's just -- gah, I don't know. Is it the belligerant girls who glare at me because the guy they're trying to hook up with talks to me (we were in the same class freshmen year, calm down Desperate Debbie), the sophomore boys who confuse me for a freshman before I even get to lie to their faces about being one, or the sweaty packing of people who just stand around anyway, drinking rushee beer and crossing their fingers that they'll make a huge mistake that night?

Or maybe it's just my cynical attitude and that I have no motivation to get to know underclassmen/other people I don't know while they're stumbling drunk in smelly areas.

While the bars aren't mind-blowing in Salem, they do the trick when you want to avoid sloppy freshmen and the packs of jock goons who punch holes in the wall.

I sincerely hope that my weekends will be free enough so that the girls and I can travel to other colleges and have some actual fun at house parties.

Sorry Roanoke, but your parties aren't heating my tea these days. It's just better if I wait for those annual parties you throw.

Day two.

2010-09-02T22:01:00.002-04:00

My schedule on MWF is out of control, so my Tuesdays and Thursdays will hopefully be used to their full potential by getting my work done rather than sleeping all day. Which, by the way, is very tempting.

I'm stressed about how this whole semester is going to go, yet I know that once I get into "the groove" of things I'll be set -- so when I have my Wednesdays of classes 10:50am-5:30pm, cheerleading 5:30pm-7:00pm and lab 7:30pm-10:30pm, it won't be a near death experience but an irksome day of the week.

I really wish I had the time I had to read like I did when I was in England. I cannot comprehend why they even bother assigning me impossible amounts of texts of literature in two day periods when they know I'm not going to be able to digest even 1/3 of it. Seminar professors don't even expect you to read everything in the given time, but they expect you to ace their examinations and I just ask why bother? At UEA, I was given a week to read a book (or two) so I could fully incorporate everything written, have intriguing questions to bring to discussions and so on. It's Fall semester in Roanoke and this is not the way things are anymore. I've left the garden tea party and now I'm stuck in some morbid mirrorland.

Stellar start. Sarcasm? It's up to you.

2010-08-30T01:11:00.006-04:00

I feel like it would be good if I started writing vaguely about the strange situations I end up in when I'm with my friends -- however, a lot of the stuff, I feel, is either a) private or b) better told in person (you feel like you're really are there with our artful inflections, pauses and selective phrasing). Thus I will give small details that will give you an idea of whether the night was a thumbs up or thumbs down and let you ponder about how we got there and what happened after. Deal?

Dylan picked me up at the Lynchburg station at 7:39pm and was decked out in elongated hoop earrings and some shiny bronze party top. You think this would have tipped me off about what was to come but I found nothing strange about this.

"So because of circumstances," she said, "We're going to Virginia Tech from here."
"What? Where am I going to change? Where is my stuff going to go?"
"In my car."
"I hate you. Let's go."

After much dancing, walking and awkward moments ("We're leaving." "We should have taken the Snuggie!") I found myself at 3:00am curled up in the two front seats of PT cruiser half awake with Dylan in the backseat in need of an alcohol exorcist.

So only naturally around 6:00am, we remember that we were supposed to crash at someone's house. After (only slightly) terrifying a girl by breaking and entering, we managed to be welcomed to an air mattress of a nice girl that neatly fit all three of us. Oh air mattress -- I know you well. Especially when you're only half-way filled with air.

Moving in the today was beastly work but it happened -- I'm proud the only things I forgot at home were my F21 heels and a pillow. I didn't know I forgot a pillow until after I came back from Wal-Mart. Tonight my make-shift head rester is a Vera Bradley duffel.

On a more personal note:

Dear Fox Floor 2 of 2008-2009,

Remember that project we did of collaging the entire hallway?

It looked a little like this.

I'm doing it again in my room. Cheers.

My manicure lasted a full life of three days. I don't know why I even bother.

Here we go again.

2010-08-28T02:28:00.002-04:00

Any final thoughts on my last night before starting my student career as a senior of Roanoke's class of '11?

Not really.

Dan, saying good-bye is always hard, but the hardest part is over.

Hopefully I'll be popping in around October.

Hopefully this year will go fast thanks to the selective group of friends I have that make almost every moment not doing Roanoke work exciting.

Here I come, Roanoke. Look upon me with disapproval of my attitude, my crowd, and my clothes, but be impressed by the things I have and will accomplish.

My lecture.

2010-08-26T01:57:00.003-04:00

From many, many, many, many, many, many entries ago, I mentioned how I loved to browse wikiHow to read some of the most amusing, intriguing, and hilariously depressing how-to articles. I caught myself grazing through and decided to see what they had up the "writing" alley and "writing/editing career" street. I wasn't aware of how much I already knew until I started reading these how-to articles out of curiosity -- sadly, most of them are the same: start writing, submitting, cope with rejection and keep writing and submitting. Join your high school or local newspaper staff ASAP.

However, what concerns me the most is that very few of these articles (may I say, none?) stressed the importance of reading. There was one article that mentioned that reading through magazines to get a sense of voice and style, but reading in general is a must. There are other types of writing styles out in the world beyond magazines and online articles (shock to those who don't read, those who do are rolling their eyes at me right now). Try new styles, try new angles, and learn new words by reading.

I've heard from so many people that writing/publishing is a dying art, but I don't think that's entirely true. People are still reading a lot -- maybe more -- because of so much online access to books, magazines, and blogs.

My advice for people who want to become writers would be not to. People who want to be writers are (a lot of the time) people who just want to be published and be the next J.K. Rowling or Stephenie Meyers. For what it's worth, I don't consider Stephenie Meyers a talented writer. Anyone with half an ounce of knowledge of writing and literature would be able to tell you that. People read it because it's crack. It's bad for you and a waste of your time.

Anyway, because I like precision, here's the division of people: those who want to be writers and those who want to be better writers. People who want to improve their writing already have the passion and, most likely, talent to consider themselves writers. People who want to be writers just want to be famous. There is a difference between person A who writes, throws entire drafts away, hides stories, poems, and letters in their drawers and perhaps one day submits an article/story -- and person B whom, after finishing their first draft of their first story, sends it to every publishing company and crosses their fingers for a movie franchise deal in the near future.

But this is my generalization. Arguments of how wrong I am are welcomed.

If you're not my friend, I charge by the amount of crap you own.

2010-08-25T17:33:00.002-04:00

Closet cleaning is a specialty of mine thanks to my big sister and my mother. When I was young, we regularly cleaned out closets and rooms because there was a lot of room-hopping due to siblings in boarding/prep schools, moving out and home renovations. I've lived in every bedroom in the house at some point except for the (current) master bedroom. For those who don't know me, that's four bedrooms...however, one of them had turned into an office since the addition. Still, that's a lot of moving.

I've helped clean out so many closets, bedrooms, and dorm rooms of friends (and my room repeatedly since it's always a mess just hours after I've cleaned it) that I am considering a job as a host on TLC for some cleaning/organizing/makeover show. (What major do you need for that?)

It's really not as hard as you think. All you need are the four T's:

- Time -- or not, considering how quick and efficient you are.
- Type-A friend(s) who will help you with motivation and second opinions.
- Trash bags.
- Tunes

I know that the girls I've helped cleaning out their rooms were a success because I had a great team behind me as well. Dylan, Brittany, and Kylee all have Type-A personalities, talents in various styling departments, and an unforgiving attitude to clothes you shouldn't have in your wardrobe (e.g. it doesn't fit, it has holes/unremovable stains, you own three of the same thing, it's hideous, etc).

What's important about cleaning out your closet is getting rid of clutter, being reminded of things you forgot you own, and, of course, making room for things you actually need. ("What do you MEAN you don't own a pair of basic black heels?")

And before you go bossing other people around about what they should have in their closets/rooms, learn the craft first and understand you're not remodeling YOUR closet, but someone else's. This person has different tastes and styles that flatter them; learn and work with the style. Don't throw away all of their floral attire to make room for black clothes with pointy studded embellishments: you're helping them, not invading them.

I've cleaned out college dorms and by the end of two clean outs we delivered roughly six trash bags full of clothes to the Salem city Goodwill. This is a fact.

If you don't like my sassy method of getting rid of your closets excess crap, then read up on CF.net's Closet Makeover series. They're much nicer about it. But I know I'm much more efficient as a second-hand.

Understated shopping.

2010-08-25T16:48:00.003-04:00

I don't understand how antique stores and consignment shops are so underrated.

I frequently take Granny to Goodwill and Salvation Army so she can have some fun finding clothes that probably won't fit her (how many grown up things can you have at a thrift store that fit a 4'9" tiny Asian?) and I always notice the smell. It's the smell that gets me first and it's always that same smell in every thrift store, whether I'm in a warehouse in Queens collecting designer jackets and shirts off of the floor or in a neatly organized Goodwill in Connecticut looking for an ugly Christmas sweater for an upcoming party. How do I describe it...? Stale, eye-wincing and possibly a quick crinkle of the eyebrows. It's a manageable scent, but still an odor nonetheless. I don't know Goodwill or Salvy's process is in receiving donations (from the trash bag to the hanger? I know they don't dryclean), but I think that is just one of the reasons why I don't purchase at thrift stores a lot. However, I do donate to them frequently so don't judge. If you're a female and you've shopped at Goodwill in Bristol, you probably have something of mine in your closet right now.

Consignment shops are different. They don't take L.L. Bean sweaters from '93 with holes in them or dresses with stains. Consignment shops (good ones, anyway) value high quality, well-known brands and attire and often have fabulous vintage collections.

I bring this up today because I'm about to send it several things to Doubletakes in Canton which happens to be a personal favorite of me, my sister and my mother. I like shopping there because there's no smell and I can trust that the clothes aren't going to have holes, stains or stray hairs with questionable orientations. Doubletakes demands that clothes need to be cleaned, pressed and delivered on hangers because, dammit, this is a place likes nice things.

While their website is a little hokey for my personal taste, the shop is great. I always find something there whenever I visit and it's often jewelry. This is probably because I already own my own D+B purse -- they have a great selection of designer purses, from Coach, to Brighton, and of course, Dooney and Bourke. If you've ever seen me with that brown, slouchy bags lined with studs, that is my sister's old Kooba bag and they sell Kooba products at Doubletakes too!

Antique stores may also have the smell at times but they offer great products too. The name escapes me (please remind me if you know) but my mother and I stopped by a brick building in Canton that had great antique/vintage fashion pieces and creaky, narrow stairs. Mom picked up a beautiful vintage leopard print purse from the 60's with a chain shoulder strap! Had I the money, I would have purchased it.

I like antique stores because I enjoy having pieces in my wardrobe that I don't see terribly frequently on other people. I got my leopard print faux fur coat at Charlotte's Web in Salem -- after peer pressure from my roommate's mother -- and my senior prom dress was from an antique store on Long Beach. (Something with a wizard? That was the name of it.)

So like I said, these are great places to shop. I'm about to send in some clothes to Doubletakes because for the past week I've been packing for senior year and cleaning out my closet at the same time. Closet organization will be for another time.

My Horror Flick moment.

2010-08-24T00:31:00.004-04:00

No, that's not a Scrubs episode title. This JUST happened.

Have you ever seen an exact scene replica from a horror/thriller movie play out before your very eyes in real life?

Ever seen someone react to something like that even though you've never seen the movie?

I've never seen this movie. Dan won't let me. But I know enough about it.

I know scary movies. I like to get caught up in them and close my eyes when the scary stuff is about to happen, but still watch through my fingers anyway. I know the fears the movies prey on people, so stuff like curtains that move by themselves (GHOSTS!) or doors that open by themselves (ALIENS!) and strange cracks and creaks in a house at night (DEMONS!) will freak anyone out.

Slasher movies are easy because it's about seeing a monster, being afraid of the dark, and other corny things. I remember watching Nightmare on Elm Street with Tini and Mere and then during our sleepovers, I'd torture them, telling them that we too live in suburbia and we too will have a serial killer come tap on our second story window. Squeals and whining ensued. Don't get me wrong, I get scared by movies even after they're over too. Not when I have other people around; but, you know, going to sleep alone in dark room is a little daunting.

Another neuteralizing factor of watching scary movies is that every time I watched a horror flick at Tini or Mere's house (come on, back then The Ring was scary, okay?) I had to walk home by myself in the dark. You get used to that kind of thing.

So there I was, hanging out with Dan in his room after a night of, well, nothing. We watched the ending to Kick-Ass with JW, Nate and Anna, then watched 1 and a 1/2 episodes of Scrubs season 4 before retiring to his room to enjoy each other's company. While we were lying in his bed (DEAR DAN: YOUR ROOM IS FREEZING -- GET A HEATER) we stopped dead in our conversation (it was in happy tones until then) because the door to his room moved, creaking its way from closed to wide open, oh...so...slowly. As Dan looked on in anticipation (or terror), I slowly pulled the blankets over my head, hoping whatever came into the room would go away.

"You're awesome in shitty situations," Dan laughed, upon explaining that's exactly how the door opened in The Fourth Kind.
"Whatever I've never even seen the movie," I replied. My inner thirteen year old emerged and I just had to tease him. "Next thing you know," I warned. "You're going to see a white owl at your window."

A scratching noise came from the window right next to me.

"I WAS JUST KIDDING." I screamed and dug my (nicely manicured) nails into his side. "OMG I WAS JUST KIDDING KILL IT KILL IT!"

Even though Dan and I were well aware it was just the tree branch knocking hello thanks to the windy evening, he checked his clock out of Hollywood superstition. It was not 3:33am. If it was, I would have been extremely pis--peeved. I would have been peeved.

Dan doesn't get legitimately scared frequently, but he can be spooked. "Hey Liz? I think it's time for me to drive you home." He probably also wanted to get medical help for the scars I left on him. Whoops.

I'll still be able to sleep tonight because a) I haven't seen The Fourth Kind, b) my door is sturdy enough that it does not open by itself on any occasion and c) my shades are down so seeing anything, much less a white owl-looking-thing is highly improbable.

This concludes that if my door opens slowly on its own and I see a white ANYTHING beyond my shades, I have earned the right to shit myself and cry.

Don't laugh because you would too.

It's a fact: women love lists.

2010-08-23T15:17:00.003-04:00

Goals for Senior Year:

-Stretch more often; become more flexbile

-Not taking on as many personal projects during the school year: this year, it's decorating my room, knitting, and my blog. No more other arts and crafts, aimless Craigslist and Forever21 browsing, or listlessly watching TV in my free time.

-Go to (even) fewer Roanoke college parties - Gilligan's, Alumni weekend and maybe one other will suffice. Also: Not attend any Salemite parties. Unless Emma is there.

-Save money for Vegas trip in March.

-Not loan anything from my closet to anyone without certain incentives.

-Take better care of my skin; my cousin shared that several of her friends in their mid-30s died of skin cancer.

-Pass Astronomy with a C+ or higher.

-Decorate my room to make up for my minimalist lifestyle last semester due to moving back from England mid-year.

-See/party with Isch and Mo again before I graduate.

As promised.

2010-08-20T00:27:00.002-04:00

Why are you sitting there reading this. You should be knitting. If you don't know how to knit, you should learn. It's awesome.

If you can do friendship bracelets/hemp weaving/looms, you can knit. It's frustrating to learn at first but after I got the hang of it I produced a shawl for my Granny to wear when it gets cold within a week. And that week was a week of working and stuff, not a lot of sitting around time. Which is why I knitted (knat?) on the subway. As I've told several people already, there's probably a picture of me somewhere online knitting on the subway with a caption of "LOL WTF OLD LADY ALERT STOP KNITTING AND BEING A VIRGIN LMAO!!!!111!!!1"

(The internet should be a privilege, not a right.)

Sherman had told me about knitting years ago (like, two) and at the time I was intrigued but lacked the motivation and convenience to do it. Sure enough, one day I was on the couch watching Entourage (just kidding - it was probably a cartoon) and my mother handed me knitting needles, yarn and a how-to book. "Learn something" she said.

It's so relaxing and time-killing. It's also a cheap crafting activity (so far) -- I'm going to get rid of a majority of my sewing/jewelry crafting supplies to make room for knitting paraphenalia. I might go back to sewing rag bunnies one day. Maybe. Probably unlikely. And yes, I'll still help anyone with scrapbooking if they ask.

Seeing as I've learned this month, I am already on my third scarf and my mistakes have lessened by each one; this is impressive, so be dazzled. I'm hoping this scarf will have no holes in it. Soon enough I'll be making hats, mittens, and eventually Weasley sweaters for my family and friends. If you just rolled your eyes, suck it. Because Meredith is totally psyched.

Also, you won't get one. Nyeh.

The musings I get inspired from Granny

2010-08-20T00:08:00.004-04:00

In case you didn't know, my Granny, a 4'9" Chinese woman with a passion for dancing and who once possessed a talent for making all of her own clothes, has spent the summer with me and my family. She has alzheimer's, deaf in one ear, and doesn't speak a vast amount of English. For the past few days I've been looking after her, making her meals, taking her out to lunch/ice-cream, taking her shopping at Goodwill and giving her simple activities to do to help her pass the time living in the suburbs. She misses her home in the city of San Fransisco and complains that there is nothing to do here. At her age, without a retirement home and a lot of money, she's pretty much got this place pinned. This is why I resort to writing, arts and crafts, and reading books and blogs about fashion. Granny resorts to TV, unless I give her something to do like wound knitting yarn, ironing, and folding laundry -- pretty much anything that doesn't affect her arthritis, which prevents her from knitting with me.

She calls me "Isabelle" and whether it's because she can't pronounce Elisabeth or she actually thinks that's my name I'll never know. My mother has explained to me that even though Granny can't name the date, remember if she went shopping with me the day before, or forget the cup of tea she had asked for minutes ago, she still has a memory for several things. Examples include knitting and sewing (even though she can't work with her hands anymore), cooking Chinese food, and every dance move she's ever learned. I find it fun that even though she cannot read English, she can read the price tags and sizes on clothes.

Spending so much time with my Granny makes me think -- what will I remember if I start to lose my memory? Even if I forget where I am, will I still be able to play the highest points possible on my Scrabble rack like my Grandfather? Even if I begin to not recognize familiar faces, will I still be able to recite the lyrics to The General? The most popular colors of fashion for the current season? (They're olive tones, red, deep purples, grey, and camel, by the way.) The speech I gave to calling applicants when I worked at my summer job in NYC?

Hopefully I'll still know how to knit. I feel like reading and writing will stay prominent with me, but knitting is a priceless skill to have when I become old and have to sit around for most of the day.

I've decided the next entry will be about knitting.

Seattle. No visuals.

2010-08-19T23:57:00.002-04:00

I've been meaning to write about my trip to Seattle as a first timer for a while but as usual I got caught up in other things -- taking care of Granny, knitting and nights out with Dan. Yeah, so, back to writing,

I was hoping my sister would have posted the pictures by now so I could give a fun visual (plus I'm vain) however this has not occured so instead I'll give you the paragraph description:

Breath-taking moutain scenery with sunny skies and cool air from the water landscape were often interrupted by thoughts of being attacked by vampires and werewolves. However, we were not in Forks, but the quaint town Anacortes with a lovely pale yellow inn and a cluttered, eclectic store of crap called "Elisabeth's"! I'm sad it wasn't a clothing or arts/crafts boutique. The wedding was beautiful, graced with gorgeous weather to be married by a water/mountain view. This wedding made me want to have a small wedding as well. My sister won the bottle of wine that served as the centerpiece of our reception table. Parkes of all ages tore up the dance floor.

Would I live in Seattle? Not really my thing, so no. Would I spent a mini vacation there to do outdoorsy activities and meander the tiny shops of Anacortes and tour the underground dwellings of Seattle? Of course! And I would suggest it to other people.

Amusement never ceases in the Parke household.

2010-08-16T15:39:00.004-04:00

I'm currently watching "The Dark Knight" with my grandmother and every time the Joker is on screen she mutters "vampire!" -- I nod and politely agree with her, then continue typing.

Also, this is awesome.

Where was I -- oh yeah, so my last week in New York City was rather quiet. I worked at night, slept during the day, and packed up everything I owned in that tiny room I dwelled in. It was not a long, tender farewell -- Goodbye airmattress, goodbye unfurnished, windowless room, goodbye closet and goodbye cupboard that was mine in the kitchen. I bellowed out a goodbye to the remaining roommate who was in the shower at the time while I was running out the door to my taxi.

New York really made me endure a lot so now that I know I can work insane hours, wander the streets of Brooklyn at 4:00am without any "incidents" and other poo, I'm starting to pretend I'll be able to make it anywhere. Let's see how that goes after graduation.

This has been a very popular question recently: "What are you doing after graduation?"

I'd like to say I'm joining the circus but instead I reply that I'm keeping my eye on New York City, Philadelphia and DC. An uncle pointed out how accommodatingly cheap each of those cities are, but I'd rather try to make it in one of those cities than move out to Texas. Please don't laugh when that day comes that I actually have to pack my bags for Dallas.

I've had family members tell me that I need to start planning ahead but I really just kind of want to bask in what's happening right now -- sometimes I feel like I can't enjoy things because I'm always thinking about a year in advance. I'm aware I need to give some concern to what's going to happen next, but I feel it's important to balance what's going on in front of you and what you plan on doing two years form now. Should my cousin be looking at internships for her junior year as her freshmen orientation approaches or should she just be excited about picking out her dorm decorations and her outfit for her first day of class?

Short break now, I'm off for a walk with Fortinbras and Granny. It's so dark and dreary outside. It makes me miss Norwich.

Recaps. Part one of many.

2010-08-16T15:20:00.003-04:00

It's surprisingly frustrating whenever I find out that my blog is actually read because that obligates me to stop futzing around knitting or another time-killing activity and actually write. It's like I'm forced into doing something I'm being labeled as (and falsely proclaiming):

Actual Facebook question: "Are you Elisabeth Parke, the writer?"
My response: "Yes, how can I help you?"
What it should have been: "No, I waste my time doing other things these days. I think there's a Total Drama World Tour marathon on right now kbye."

So instead of writing a very long, tedious entry of things that have happened since I haven't been upating, I will write multiple entries to a) neatly separate the topics I write about and b) give the illusion I've updated a lot in recent days.

My last entry was creative prose and Dan made fun of me last night for making outfits from Forever21 that are under $100 ("Big whoop." "SUCK IT.") so I guess it's time for REAL LIFE STORIES!!

My internship at Joonbug ended prematurely by two days and this allowed me to work more hours at my job and go shopping with the money I earned during day-time hours. This was my last back to school shopping and so I bought...tights.

The only two things I craved that I didn't buy was a pair of flat boots for the winter (after the sudden realization that I only have heeled booties and my pink Uggs to get me through next winter -- and Uggs are not for class) and a GORGEOUS black trench in Atrium (SoHo) with the perfect about of studdage (for my taste) on the shoulders and flattering in every way.

It was at the bargain price of $200 and I had $35 in my checking at the time. Sad faaaace.

So tights it was. At least I know I'll wear them a lot and my new idea is to buy a pair of cheap tights (probably a three dollar pair at F21) and embellish them by sewing on sequins, beads, or whatever I find most attractive on the shelf.

I simply can't bring myself to by a motorcycle/bomber jacket. I don't own a motorcycle and I don't lust after vampires so even if I had that same angry edge I had in high school, I can't wear one.

Even though I'd probably look awesome in a white one. Holla!

For a final list of the articles I contributed to Joonbug.com, click here.

I could have sworn I updated last week.

2010-07-14T17:47:00.002-04:00

I'd write about things no one reads but I'm far too tired. Here's some prose I wrote yesterday instead.

In a city that never supposedly sleeps, I hear it snore peacefully at the end of my closing shift as I’m walking to the subway at four o’clock in the morning in Times Square.

I’m not alone – I pass couples and several, small packs of men either walking home from a late night or still searching for drinking hub. Every night I notice I am the only woman walking alone.

I wade through a herd of still yellow taxis, parked unabashedly on sidewalks and in streets waiting for the sun to rise and the tourists to pool in. It’s so strange to see so many parked not in traffic, but by a gas station or having their front wheels rested on a small driveway. All of them are empty, but undoubtedly filled with the bacteria and memories of the more unusual customers who rode in them.

I know I’m getting closer to the ACE, because I’m passing a string of restaurants, then the strip of residential living, and when I see the lights of Broadway theaters, I know I made it safely one third of my trip home.

A garbage truck will always drive by at some point. They pick up the trash off of the already dirty streets of this gritty city and drive away, the late-night heroes of waste-control.

The subway is quiet. No one is threatening at four o’clock in the morning. I sit and sweat and wish I was already home. I hear the rumbling of trains but it’s almost never the train I need.

The next A train is now arriving on the Downtown/Brooklyn track.

The last car of the A train. It’s me and an old man sleeping. He snores as he takes up half of a long bench. I think about how my mother worries so much. I stare at him. I could take him in a fight.

Too many stops later, I wait for the G train.

The next G train is never going to come. Give up hope now.

There is always a handful of people sitting, sweating, and waiting for that damn train. Why aren’t they in bed? They can’t all work in clubs.

I hear the G train arrive and suddenly I’m at my stop. How did I get here?

The only thing heavier than my eyelids is my head. I let it rest listlessly backwards so that I can glance up at the peeling, chipped paint that scatters like dandruff from the ceiling of the subway station. I wonder why my sister never visits me in Brooklyn.

There are some people in the street at four o’clock in the morning (it is four thirty by now). I get fewer cat calls at night than I do during the day. I know why – I look like hell after a day of work and subway sweating. What’s to call out?

And while I walk the streets of Brooklyn at this God-forsaken hour of the day, I hear something that makes it the second excuse to why I put up with closing shifts (other than my paycheck). I hear birds. How often are birds heard in the city? This is the only time of day in these concrete and brick ruins that the birds have the air to themselves to sing and practice their harmonies. I won’t hear them again until next closing shift.

After I drift up the last street, into the building and up the elevator, I collapse on my air mattress and suddenly, the city’s snoring becomes silent.

It's been a while.

2010-06-30T14:46:00.006-04:00

Chelsea asked me to do another outfit post -- where I make outfits comprised of only Forever21 merchandise (mostly because I'm far too lazy to filter through other clothing websites like the writers at Collegefashion do). So, I've decided to arrange outfits that are somewhat similar to the outfits I wear in NYC!

When I came to New York, the first thing I did after I threw all of my bags into my room was visit Sherman. He told me that if I was going to live in Brooklyn, I have to start dressing like it. So here's an idea of what I would wear if I were just walking around Bed-Stuy or Prospect Heights with Sherman.

Living in Brooklyn:

Basic, lightweight bright colored tank with shorts, comfortable flats (I usually wear my MK sneakers) and a tote bag. I use the "Ethical Shopper" tote I got at UEA and Sherman loves showing off his new canvas bag.

Internship in Manhattan:

I like to dress up for my internship at Joonbug even though it's pretty lax about dress code. It gets really hot and humind in the city so I'll try to wear a sleeveless shirt with jeans/longer shorts. Skirts and my bike shorts (they're not all lace, just laced hem) are often paired with nice t-shirts and tops with sleeves. F21 is really limited in what I like this summer, so bear with me. I really do try to wear dresses/skirts most days.

When I go to work, I have a dress code that requires me to wear a black dress (or black skirt/top) and dressy shoes. As a signature touch, I wear a pearl necklace.

Hostess outfit:

The dress here is really short and the black dresses I wear have hems a little longer than the one shown. I'm the first and last person customers see so it's been stressed how put-together and dressed-up I need to look.

Alright. time to do productive things now.

This calls for ice-cream.

2010-06-29T15:28:00.002-04:00

I found out minutes ago that I've gone from Editorial Assistant to Staff manager for the Editorial department of Joonbug. I don't know if I just changed positions or if I actually got promoted but the fact is, I am going to be reading resumes and conducting phone interviews for the rest of the summer. This will have less writing and editing, but that's fine -- one more thing for my ever-growing resume. Special thanks to the EiCs for this opportunity.

This is a position I can do from home/school/anywhere as long as I have internet access. I'll be going through applicants and after interviewing them, hand them over to whichever editorial section they applied for (or I deem fitting).

I have to go to work this evening but I plan on buying an ice-cream cone on my way there.

Fast track.

2010-06-28T12:25:00.002-04:00

I got an email concerning my graduation date today. Holy crap! I'm graduating in less than a year! What is this madness? Why can't I graduate sooner? Why can't I skip my science credit (Astronomy)/Seminar/Symposium and just take a month of class like I did in May and just graduate then?

Unless things go horrifically wrong, I'll be graduating May 6th, 2011. Mark your calendars.

I also keep looking towards July and August. I feel like I don't have enough time spent in NYC, but I really need to chill out and remember I have two months of summer left. Whoo.

I'm working Tuesday and Thursday then heading home after Joonbug Friday.

Finally.

2010-06-27T14:12:00.002-04:00

Hey everyone, I got a job.

That's all I'm going to say.

I got off the G train and started walking home at 5:00 this morning and Brooklyn is strangely pretty at that time. The sky's muddled hue of blues and hearing birds was very peaceful, even if I was completely zonked. So clearly it was perfect timing that I have severe air mattress issues. I don't know what I did wrong, but as I type this it is completely deflated on my floor. I ended up sleeping on the couch and decided I will address the issue later.

For the day, I've been sitting outside on the little balcony listening to unending car alarms and watching cars go by. I got hot and started watching So Weird episodes. There was an episode about gremlins. GREMLINS. It's amazing what I found fascinating at age 11. Freaking mind blowing.

The Last Airbender comes out this week and you best believe I'll be seeing it.

Didn't I mention I'm coming home this weekend? Yeah. I am.

Hold your breath.

2010-06-24T21:55:00.002-04:00

Okay, so a job interview seemed to go well today but I refuse to divulge publically what position/company it's for until AFTER training. I really, really need this to work out. Plus it seems like it's going to be fun. I met some of the other staff and they are a riot.

Moral: I'm superstitious. Just like my Chinese granny.

As my Chewy bar supply dwindles (I have two left), I begin to realize how much pasta and rice I really have and that I should probably start making a habit of making it. I find food in strange scenerios though (Anne's leftover Chinese, David gives me two drumsticks of his experimental chicken) so it makes me happy that I won't go hungry. Yet. The first month isn't even over.

Daylynn brought back the joy of my eleven year-old days and now I've begun to make it a habit of watching So Weird episodes. It's absolutely fascinating comparing the shows that Disney used to have in the 90s and what has become of it now. Everyone complains about Hannah Montana, but the other crappy shows such as Sunny with a Chance and Wizards of Waverly Place apparently go unnoticed in Youtube user rants.

If only my computer didn't have a virus. Sometimes when I close a certain window/tab of a website (most often Facebook or a fashion themed website such as Collegefashion.net or instyle.com), it pops up again and continues to pop up new windows of the same webpage forever. There's nothing I can do but do the "unhealthy" immediate shut-down for my laptop if I want to get anything accomplished. It's quite inconvenient. Anyone know how to stop this? Anyone else ever have this issue?

By the way, I also noticed that my blog is stuck in London time from my Fall semester in England. Whoops.

A day off from work...and I'm still on a computer.

2010-06-23T00:42:00.000-04:00

So while I was applying for more jobs, (not all of them found from Craigslist, by the way) I began to realize how truly dire this financial situation was getting. I'm not going to be in NYC for longer than 8 weeks now and let's be honest, a lot of jobs don't really like that in an applicant. The strain on finding a job now is worse than ever and I'm really close to just selling an organ or something. I'll be able to survive the summer as long as I don't go out to eat/shop/have fun, but with senior year coming up, I won't have any money leftover for textbooks which means I'll have to borrow the books from elsewhere and save up from dirt at the Writing Center.

I miss England. England was the time I had saved up all of my cash from The Gables and I had plenty of money to run around travelling, shopping and go out clubbing. New York is kind of the opposite right now. I mean, I travel to my internship from Brooklyn, I recently just shopped through my sister's hand-me-downs and a thrift store, and went to a cocktail premiere party where everything was free and I could only stay for an hour. I hope I have another chance to go to one of those things and be able to stay longer. *sigh*

Anne was telling me that the chances of me moving out to a city fresh out of graduation will be highly unlikely. She told me (as I already learned from her example) that I was probably going to be stuck in Connecticut for a few more months working, trying to save enough money so I could move out. Save money, move, THEN find a job. Apparently this is a method that works. It's far away now, but there's no problem in planning ahead...?

She keeps asking me if I will move to New York City after college. I mean, I'd LIKE to, because I'm having a good time regardless of my brokeness, but that might change. A year is a long way fom now -- I keep joking with my friends that I'm going to find my calling in Iowa and live with cows all day.

However, as of this moment, my state of mind is the city life and hope to God I can find a job that'll at least buy me a few textbooks for first semester.

Cockroach.

2010-06-22T10:38:00.002-04:00

THERE WAS A COCKROACH THE SIZE OF MY CELLPHONE CHILLING IN MY BATHROOM LAST NIGHT.

Seriously though, I didn't scream when I first saw it. I just kind of froze and said to it "Holy shit you're huge." (Kylee is now allowed to make a "that's what she said" joke tag line.) I acted swiftly though -- I got a bowler glass and a thick piece of paper, thinking I could trap it. "I'm Liz Parke," I thought to myself, "I can handle a bug even though it's the size of a horse."

Also, I'm Liz Parke who's lived in the clean dome of Lana's abode in the suburbs and the largest insect I've ever had to deal with was the infamous stink-bug-thing in Salem, Virginia. (They are about the size of a quarter. Or a nickle.) As I tried to capture the 'roach, it became very apparent that this bug was from the streets and smoked cigars. It had an attitude and was very, very fast.

I made roommate David kill it for me as I resisted the urge to stand on the toilet.

Craigslist is a Wonderful Tool for Self-Analyzing.

2010-06-21T22:31:00.002-04:00

Things I've learned about myself from browsing Craigslist:

-I need to learn QuickBook and be familiar with other computer programs.
-I should have learned Spanish/French because being bilingual is always a plus.
-I absolutely NEED to learn bartending!
-Hey, I do have experience with children. Babysitting and Renbrook Summer Adventure really paid off.
-Wait, I can type faster than 60wpm! And I'm super proficient at Microsoft Office!
-I have stellar phone/interpersonal/communication skills.
-I am very crafty. Yes, I can help you be crafty.
-I should have worked in retail (beyond the Little Red Clock Shop) for more part-time opportunities.
-Why do I feel useless because I have no experience in the Dentist industry...?
-Dammit, WHY didn't I ever take bagpipe lessons?!

Eight response emails later (so like, an hour), these are the things I've reflected over. I really don't want to go back to Diva now because the more I mull over it, the less I want to work there and the more avidly I look for jobs on Craigslist.

I just realized this is my third week in New York City. Yikes.

Hope everyone who reads this (what, like five people?) likes the new layout.

I could easily rant about money issues...

2010-06-20T22:56:00.003-04:00

...but I'd much rather talk about the more positive things that are happening right now that make my life in NYC seem much more fabulous than it really is.

So today I went to Sushisamba for a Brazil vs. Ivory Coast game viewing party hosted by Leblon, who was featuring their new light rum and tastey Latin/Asian fushion dishes. I went by myself because I was going to have to bolt afterwards to a job interview in Times Square and I tried to look as confident and chic as possible because I actually felt incredibly awkward and out of place. All of the people there were with magazines and other media-based jobs whilst I was just an intern filling in for EiC. The only person I really go to talking to was Jesse from Maxim, who was there with his roommate and thoroughly enjoying the bottomless glasses of Caipirinha. I merely sipped the beverages, drank lots of water and ate the mini tacos and Kobe beef sliders because I didn't want to be drunk for my interview (bad news bears). Jesse gave me some words of advice when it comes to the editorial media industry and was courteous enough to make small talk with the 21 year-old intern.

The place was packed with yellow and green, as well as two women donned in Brazilian dancing gear (beaded bikinis and huge feathers on their heads) shaking their boo-tays to drums. They did this again after Brazil made their first goal. I was very disappointed I couldn't stay longer.

Nonetheless, I ran out (graciously) to Times Square where I interviewed for a hosting gig. Let's hope I get a call back. I don't know when I'll have to go back to Diva for my menu test but I really need a job for a back-up because the longer I work at Diva the less appealing it becomes.

I did an unwise thing and bought icecream today with Sherman. Actually, it was frozen yogurt but it was absolutely divine and changed my life (when it comes to dessert). This was after a visit to a quaint bookstore and Sherman showing off his new artsy tote bag. Shout out to Sherms: thanks again for holding one of my two pairs of shoes.

Joonbug and apartment life is going well still. I converted a roommate to becoming a fan of Cracked.com and it's nice to come back to the apartment after a long hot day in Manhattan to have a tall glass of cold water. Aaah.

Let's hope this week will bring money into my account. My fingers are crossed.

First Weekend in NYC and I was lost in Queens.

2010-06-19T23:11:00.004-04:00

Hahaha I make that sound so terrible. I was roaming the streets of Queens at 9:00am this morning looking for my sister because we went to a thrift store sale (you read right) and for ten dollars I got 16 items of clothes, including brands such as: Zara, J.Crew, New York & Company, Banana Republic, Gap, and American Apparel. Now, I must say that I spent another 5 dollars washing most of the clothes when I got back (since the other half was dry-clean...bummer) but I think I made out pretty well.

What one needs to know about my sister and I is that we are hunters. When we shop, we don't mind the unorganized clothing racks and bins of shoes (don't get me wrong, pristine shops are wonderful) but sometimes it's just so much more rewarding when you actually work to find a piece of attire you really like and is worth having.

I've learned that if I get lost, I am more likely to get directions sooner from people when I mimick a foreign accent. Sometimes I do Italian, sometimes a vague French accent, and other times an English one. I have to choose which accent I do carefully or else God forbid I run into someone who speaks six different languages. Whoops. (But seriously, it's so much cuter if you're a tourist and you're foreign, not when you're an "out of towner" Ah-murr-ican.)

Anyway, my internship has increased my responsibilities with reading resumes, arranging phone interviews and conducting them. This involves a lot of charts (for me to write for my own personal preference), reading resumes and emails, and using my Country Club phone voice. It's about two octaves higher than my regular voice. Maybe three.

I've also attended a press launch for WannaJet with my EiC last week, as well as meeting last week. (Maybe it'll become a regular thing?) I'm not sure if I'm allowed to talk about the meeting in detail, but apparently it was such a big deal that EiC treated himself to icecream after. I didn't do much in the meeting except sit, smile, and listen intently. I wasn't sure if I was expected to take notes or partake in the conversation. I'm pretty sure EiC just wanted the company on his way there.

I've been training for three days at a swanky restaurant/bar/lounge in SoHo and tomorrow I have to take a test on the menu. This doesn't make me happy because a) every time I started serving tables, I was told to stop --because I'm training -- thus inhibiting my familiarity with the menu, b) no one else who works there now had to ever take a test on the menu because now it's under new management and c) I'm really just aiming for the hostess gig. Although servers make more money than a hostess, servers pool their tips and split them evenly. I would rather know that the money I worked for is going to just me than work four tables while the other waiter works one with 2 people and get my share of tips. On a more positive note, I've learned how to open a bottle of wine without setting it on a table and how to present it. If this ever comes in handy beyond restaurant service, please let me know.

I'm told to just follow waiters around and learn from them, but what seems to get lost in translation is that I know how to take orders and I have a good memory (for up to 4 people, anyway). They think I need practice with that when I really need help learning the menu. None of the people who trained me did a terrific job, but I did learn a little something from each one. The server who trained me that I learned the most from was Rodon, who is a cynical hardass, so naturally I gave him a hard time by calling him "Rodo" and smiling a lot. He emphasized the importance of knowing the menu, knowing what questions to ask when specifying an order, and how to recite what foods are available at what times. What happened everyday of my training was that when things got too busy, no one asked me to help them with little things or told me to do anything so I ended up standing in the doorway and did what came naturally -- smile, invite people in, and seat them. I got more experience hosting than waitressing so that's another reason why I should get the hostess gig.

Fun fact: I met a famous Turkish actor on Friday while I was training. Apparently he's like the Brad Pitt of Turkey. If I was more familiar with Turkey, this would probably mean something to me.

Tomorrow I'm going to Sushisamba for the Brazil vs. Ivory Coast game cocktail party because my EiC asked me to and I want something fun to do on a Sunday. I'm going to end up buying one drink and attempt to talk to strangers so I have something to write about later. And of course, right after that, I'm bolting to SoHo to take my menu test. I wonder what happens if I fail...am I not hired? Do I just continue training? Wish me luck!

I'm doing my part in building traffic

2010-06-09T10:27:00.002-04:00

If you're visiting Joonbug anytime soon, check out this articles in the D.C. section that I wrote:

-FUR sounds like a blast...

-Pink Lingerie Show at FUR!

-D.C. Votes on Top Three DJs

-Meeps for Keeps

-5th Summer Spirit Festival

-Cuban Oasis (Review for Habana Village)

-D.C. Fashion Week Coming this September

The others have not yet been posted. You may notice that some of them are quite short, but it takes a lot of research online to find these places, read up on them, and then think of ways to make them look fun and interesting. D.C. is hard to write about when you rarely ever go there and it's not really a place that sparks "exciting hot nightlife" in the mind. I try though.

By myself in two days I've written ten articles and the most that is expected of people here to type up in a day is three. I'm the only one working on D.C. right now so I guess I should work more.

Back to rowing the ship.

B38-Q-R and dirty looks

2010-06-09T10:02:00.002-04:00

My commute to work felt like the norm by the second day -- however, I haven't yet taken a direct route back to my apartment but it has something to go with the L and the G. I wonder if that will ever become an issue.

I love waking up to Facebook posts and messages asking me how my fabulous life is in NYC as I roll off of my air mattress (with red sheets and a Spider-man blanket) in my unfurnished, windowless, closet of a room. My stuff is on the floor with the exception of a few pieces of attire that were deemed worthy of wire coat hangers.

I mean, to me, my city life IS fabulous because I'm living with great roommates, I live in funky-cool Brooklyn and work in the chic, fast paced walls of Manhattan. Well, the streets are fast paced. Not my job -- right now, anyway.

I've been assigned (for now) to build content for the D.C. section of Joonbug.com so when the new site is launched there will be some stuff there to increase interest and thus, traffic. Eventually when things are figured out, I will be assisting the editor for the NYC tier of the website, meaning I'll be looking over all of the sections (Scene Track, Frequency, Almost Famous, etc) and writing some of my own. For now, it's all about D.C.; my job is to make it look super cool for young adults who like to party.

Things get wonky after sitting in front of a computer for hours though -- I don't know how my Dad does it for his job, and I'm doing interesting things like pop culture, not numbers. I drink a lot of a fluids so I have to go to the bathroom frequently, allowing me time to stretch and walk around, away from the computer.

Right now I'm sitting in (what I think is) the "Glam Damn It" section of computers in the office (you pick and choose your computer station) and they are the Fashion article writers. I understand that I'm "the new kid" (among like 3 new interns this week), but no one has really been talking to me except for the Nightlife intern and my supervisor. Few people here seem friendly so I just kind of keep to myself, churn out articles like a machine and hope that a few more days will break the ice. Anne reminded me that New York is a dog-eat-dog work city and that it's probably all for the best I just work hard and forget about trying to make friends.

(Also, my relaxed/focused face isn't very welcoming so it's probably my own fault I look mean.)

Speaking of mean looks, it's funny when I get on the elevator with other people who work in the building because they always give me dirty looks for taking the elevator to the second floor. Let me tell you -- I've tried to take the stairs but the door is locked to enter the second floor from the stairwell so one must take the elevator. I attempted to be healthy. Didn't work out.

For the record, I dislike Trader Joe's. I don't really care how real and earthy my food is, I need cheap food in my belly. That's it. I'm eating Trader O's and "real" crunchy peanut butter and I don't care. I preferred Salisbury's in England over Trader Joe's any day.

I got to interview an upcoming band called Sinclarity and since I never took a journalism class, I asked them like five questions and then left awkwardly. They were filming a music video (with David Rodriguez as the director) and I could hear them rehearsing from my apartment, the music was so LOUD. Also, it was a block away. And I could see them from my balcony. Keep an eye out for a music video by them called "Wake Up" that's filmed on a warehouse roof.

Anyway, did anyone simply LOVE the Glee finale? I was so happy when Santana and Puck sang together. I simply love them. Not as a couple, but they are my favorite characters.

I am absolutely lost without my heels. I brought one pair of high heels for the first week and that was a TERRIBLE LIFE DECISION. When I get home this weekend I'm FILLING my bag with high heels.

Well, here goes day three at work. I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing today other than writing more D.C. articles, even though there have been hints of plans of jobs I'm going to learn/do. But I probably won't find out until this afternoon because no one tells me anything.

And now for something legitimate.

2010-06-06T22:04:00.004-04:00

Now that I have something to actually document - this hasn't happened since England - I will be more apt to write about my life.

Today I moved into my apartment in Brooklyn and tomorrow I will be starting my internship at Joonbug.com. If you think that happened all very fast, it did. I mean, I got the internship two months ago. Finding a place to stay happened within a week. It was all very stressful, but somehow things came together.

I found a windowless, unfurnished room with A/C in Bed-Stuy and share a four-bedroom apartment with two guys and a girl, all in their later 20s. The girl graduated as an English major a few years ago and the guys are both business/computer types. Good mix, hm?

I have yet to fill up my assigned cabinet with food or even inflate my mattress since I arrived at Grand Central station today at 2:45 with a very heavy duffel bag, a backpack, and three carry-ons (one of them, a pillow). I still need to make (literally) my bed, complete with hastily purchased red sheets at Wal-Mart and a plushy Spider-man throw. My shoulders still have red marks from the straps of my bags and how heavy they were.

I had dinner at Sherman's apartment and it was only a half-hour walk from my apartment. I experienced firsthand his infatuation with yellow rice and beans. I forced him to eat veggies with this meal. After dinner we took a short walk to Blue Marble and had some delicious ice-cream. I'm positive my visits will be frequent and give me a good work-out.

I'm very nervous about getting to my internship tomorrow, but the quickest way I've found is the bus and the R rail. Wish me luck on my first day tomorrow!

Internship hunting, swamped, and Bingo. You read that right.

2010-02-08T01:03:00.005-05:00

If you've been watching the weather news lately, you've probably caught wind that my college's area has been hammered by snow. As fun as it was the first snowfall, Salemites and Roanoke students alike became vexed by the continual pummeling of snow. Southerners are driving around in their cars with Everest on their rooftops. People are slipping on ice. Classes were cancelled Friday. Parties have been difficult to get to.

Some losers, like this one, helped build snow forts

with nothing but a lunch tray.

As such, Friday night not only displayed further proof that I go to a retirement home for my college education (and that attention-whores get what they want when they sit on bleachers and make out distastefully), but I proved victorious when I won a collection of items from Bingo. These items included a 12 pack of soda, popcorn, two DVDs (each containing four films), and a board game I'd rather not mention. Ask me in private if you want a good laugh.

Okay, so you'll probably be reading a lot about Valentine's Day and what to wear; I'll just leave that to Collegefashion.net and leave out the Valentine fashion lecture. Seeing as that I haven't formally celebrated Valentine's Day in three years, I see no reason to suggest what you should wear.

Instead, here is not one, but two outfits I've created from nothing but F21 gear. The first is rather plain, but helps me look forward to spring weather!

Spring fashion is released in February and I'm so excited! I channeled Hilary Duff's look from Gossip Girl (NEW EPISODES MARCH) and if it looks like I based the outfit around the fedora hat, I did. I usually don't go for the fedoras but that one was just so charming with the colorful band -- I used a basic white T and boyfriend jeans to focus more on simplicity and colorful details. I threw in an anchor necklace because I felt it was obligatory. Yay nautical!

The second is one I made a LONG time ago and based it off of my friend Betsy's pick: The purple floral cardigan. I made an outfit to reflect her cold campus in NH (which, ironically, doesn't have snow unlike sunny Salem. That is buried in feet of snow.) and her love of owls.

I feel as though this outfit is more current-weather friendly than my other one. Screw you, Pux, no one asked for six more weeks of winter.

Believe it or not I've been swamped with things to do/take care of in the first few weeks I've been back at Roanoke. My presentation for English majors about England, cover letters for internships, editing my resume, the ludicrous amount of reading I'm supposed to read and digest in an unreal time-frame, cheerleading, and the Writing Center, just to name a few. I hate sending people my schedule because you'd look at it and say "Pft, your class hours are ideal, you cotton-headed ninny muggins!" but it never includes the rando meetings I have or the time spent on my summer plans. I haven't been so nerve-racked about applications since high school and I got early admission so it didn't last long. I keep thinking at night, what if I don't get my dream internship in NYC? What if I don't get any at all?

I wonder how Amandalee is fairing in England...

Last few hours of being underage...

2010-01-10T19:08:00.002-05:00

...And I'm hanging out on the computer. Just kidding, I did stuff today. I got a haircut (The "B" haircut for those who voted) and while playing Mario Party 8, out loud musings earned me some bangs cut by Kylee herself. I can't remember the exact age I last had bangs (single digits, no doubt), but it's weird falling under another white person stereotype. However, I'm liking it so far.

I attempted to meet a girl on my floor by asking where the laundry room is even though someone already gave me vague directions. I introduced myself off hand and she told me where it was and then went back to her room. Hm. Either I'm a lot scarier (weird??) than I've been told or she's rude. Guess I'm not going to have many friends on my floor of...three...other people.

Speaking of the girls at my school, I'd like to make an announcement:

DEAR ROANOKE COLLEGE FEMALE STUDENT BODY:

WEARING A SWEATSHIRT AND LEGGINGS IS NOT OKAY. LEGGINGS ARE NOT PANTS. PLEASE COVER AT LEAST HALF OF YOUR ASS TO SHOW YOU HAVE A SLIGHT PIECE OF DIGNITY. LEAVE YOUR "LEGGINGS AS PANTS" STATEMENT IN THE PRIVACY OF YOUR OWN HOME. THERE ARE OTHER WAYS TO HAVE GUYS CHECK OUT YOUR REAR. I SUGGEST "JUICY" OR "PINK" PANTS OR EMBELLISHED BUTT POCKETS ON JEANS.

THANK YOU.

I'll be at the bar tonight. If you're not there with me, have a round for me. Thanks.

Back in VA. Yeah.

2010-01-09T16:30:00.001-05:00

My return to Roanoke has been...placid. I enjoyed setting up what little I had in my room -- no decorations, no microwave or refridgerator, not even my cheap full length mirror from Walmart -- and spending some quality time with Kylee and her Wii. I hit the gym this morning and discovered how horrendously out of shape I was but that's okay because there were few people to judge me. However, I was laughed at by the girl next to me when my iPod switched to a new song that's volume was TEN TIMES LOUDER THAN THE LAST SONG so I nearly blew out my eardrums and yelped as I lunged to fix the skewed volume settings. I guess I would've laughed too if I wasn't bleeding out of my ears.

I discovered today I was at my lowest weight since I started checking it at college, but then sighed when I realized it was from lack of muscle. Swedish power bars, anyone?

I bought my required paperbacks, ate some poptarts, and intended on getting a hair trim today but the salons were all booked. I feel like trying something new but at the same time terrified. Bangs? Too much work to manage. Layers? Too boring. Super short hair? I'll save that when I have kids and too busy for long showers. I really don't know what to do if I wanted to do something different with my hair. Suggestions?

Having alone time forces me to read (ugh, I know, right?) and after reading a few chapters of "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" (I recommend), I consulted my 'Zaar "Great Style" book and followed it's advice. As part of my New Years Revolution, I intend to spend less of my fashion money at Forever 21 by buying only basics and fewer dresses, coats, "fancy" tops, etc. Fewer.
As such, I used my Gift card to buy some tanks, a new crisp white t-shirt and button down, and some cheap jeans. A good start. Hopefully I can keep to this when spring/summer clothing rolls around.

I like my living conditions so far -- I'm directly across from the bathroom and a water fountain, I have one neighbor and the rest of my neighbors are on the other side of the bathroom or a floor above. If anyone ever visits, there's plenty of room for you on my floor. I can probaby fit about seven marines on my floor. I doubt Andy or Mo read this so that reference is meaningless to everyone else.

I am famished. I wonder what Chef Bob is serving this evening.

At least I update more often than Maddox

2010-01-03T22:03:00.003-05:00

Why does no one ever make New Years resolutions anymore? Are people so lazy and vain enough to think they don't need to change or better themselves? Or is it because people try to avoid guilt when they give up on their resolution halfway through January or February? Determination and consistancy seem to be rare these days, or at least in the people I've been asking.

My New Year resolutions include being more forward-thinking and active about my dreams of working as an editor in a publishing company or as a part of the editorial staff for a fashion magazine. As such, I'm going to make an effort to buy less frivolous party clothes for frat parties and attempt to purchase more items that I will more likely be wearing after college. I have begun to finally "find" my style (many thanks to Anne for giving me Harper's "Book on Style" for Christmas! It really helped me!) so now it's that much easier to shop for myself.

I've also decided to try something new for my blog: since I'm constantly browsing Forever 21, I'm going to make a way to guarantee that I'll be updating once a month. Once or twice a month, I will collaborate things I particularly like on Forever 21 and make an outfit that costs $100 or less. This will not only show what my "style" is being defined, but also be a good source of procrastination and maybe help my friends find something they like as well.

So here's the first one -- hopefully of many:

I have created a "wish list" so you can find all of the items in one easy place.
Just go to Forever21.com, click "wish lists" and look up by email: ecparke@roanoke.edu and select BLOG January.

For the record, I would suggest the pearl earrings for day, diamonds for evening, and the cameo earrings if they're your style. This is an outfit I'd wear to class sophomore year or going out, like to the movies, a dinner, or a 21ST BIRTHDAY PARTY THE ELEVENTH!! I already have a strapless red dress and the same blazer, but as every fashionista knows, never wear a designer or store look head to toe. These things are just what I'd put on manikins. (sp?) Clearly my time in England influenced my fashion tastes; if I had layered on some necklaces, selected a sequined purse and picked out booties with studs, this would totally look Topshop. But I digress.

I know it's not exactly LA fashion as F21 is all about, but whatever. BTW does anyone else think the girl posing in that blazer looks stupid?

Happy New Years!

Home for the Holidays

2009-12-24T12:41:00.002-05:00

And when I mean holidays, I really mean Christmas and New Years.

I had one day trip to London with Michael before finishing up my papers and flying home the 12th. We breezed past a lot of London must-sees (most of them I had already experienced during a family trip way back when), got lost in the shadier parts of London and had a blast in Harrods. The day ended with fish and chips and a sleepy bus ride back to UEA.

Kelly, Philly and Beth sent me off with a bunny friend with a UEA t-shirt (his name is Achilles), Tom sent me off with a wooden cat from Bali and the rest of STC01 made my last night at UEA memorable with water fights and shower parties.

I was surprised by how huge Fortinbras has gotten since we first brought him home last summer and I surprised Dan that Saturday night by having him come back from Subway to find me on his bed playing with his dog, Bruiser.

Highlights since I've been home include going to NYC with Anne and meeting up with Dylan and Cody. We had lunch at Lillie's, got lost on the subway that headed to Brooklyn, not Times Square and got an exclusive visit to one of the floors at Condenast. I won't go into details but it was so cool for me.

Hanging out in Farmington has been slightly surreal after being in England for three months. It was as if I had just gotten used to going to classes twice a week, travelling wherever, whenever and spending most of my time in lesiure clothes. Now back home, it's back to dressing up for the latest dinner party, waiting for friends to pick me up at my house since I have no car nor public transportation at my convenience, and no longer having to cook for myself - a trend that will continue when I go back to Roanoke and its dining hall. I have collected my souveniers from England in a box to scrapbook/document later.

Speaking of, a night at Betsy's with Kelly was a blast from the past when Betsy uncovered a bunch of my short stories that I wrote in high school, that being read after years proved a) even though I've never done any drugs, I was on the biggest acid trip during junior year and b) apparently I had a secret hatred for Kelly because I inadvertantly had her brutally harmed, killed or ignored altogether in nearly every story. My personal favorite is the Legends of the Hidden Temple adventure.

Okay, on to other things.

So apparently the new sexy thing is to be androgynous and wear nothing but black. As much as I love New York and love black get ups as much as the next person, I don't believe this is look is as "sexy" as the NYTimes have it cracked up to be. For the record, the hour-glass figure will always be sexy and in style. Maybe it's just me, the low-brow fashionista, but how is this sexy? I actually screamed a little when that slide came up. I feel this trend is more for the models with the bodies of tall lanky eleven year olds. Sometimes sexy in the fashion industry greatly differs from sexy in real life.

Again, maybe it is just me -- my personality and overral presence can be overwhelming and severe so if I dressed in severe clothing and all black all the time, it would make me even less approachable. I'll hang on to my colorful, flowy summer dresses for now, kthanks.

For other clothing, they're not so lucky. I have two full Lord and Taylor bags of clothes I'm getting rid of. First come first serve, then it's off to Goodwill!

I've been toying for the font size for fifteen minutes.

2009-12-02T20:44:00.010-05:00

So of course instead of finishing up my 500 word essay about my poetic skills (answer: zero), or finishing the first draft of my Gothic short stories (werewolves -- except they wear their shirts when human) OR starting my Chaucer essay at 1:00am, I chose to play online Scrabble and look at pretty clothes.

So I stumbled across this pretty thing, shat myself (pardon my language) and needed to write about it, even though I could've written about Bath and Essex weeks ago. No matter, here I am.

Divine.

For those who don't know (or care -- losers), this is a Lela Rose bow dress that I want to own, to possess in every sense of the word. This isn't your F21 or H+M, guys, this dress is for the high rollers. Seeing as I am not completely fluent in the world of higher fashion, I'm still waiting around for Forever 21 to make a knock-off of it. Even then, it won't be 100% silk and I doubt there will be a built-in bodice. I sigh dreamily. If you have to ask how much it is, you can't afford it.

Speaking of clothing, whoever has been dressing Serena van der Woodsen needs to be reconsidered. Lively's stylist has been peeving me recently and I highly suggest (s)he be replaced by whoever did the past seasons. In case you haven't noticed, Serena has been wearing SHORTS to show off her lucious legs outdoors in November. Watch a few past season 3 episodes and ask: "Isn't she cold?" Also -- that ratty pony tail from 3X09 with the horrifically large-shouldered dress in Tripp's office? Bleh. Go look for it and say I'm wrong. Was anyone else freaking out Deroda being preggers?

Parenting tip for Ms. Waldorf: give your child an earlier heads up when you up and move to Paris. Just a suggestion.

Oh right, so I've been travelling!

Fail.

My adventure to Bath was unusual because this time I had a friend with me this time. That's right -- just to remind you, I travelled alone (much to the horror of my mother) to Great Yarmouth, Cambridge and Oxford. This made my experience in Bath that much more interesting because I was with my friend Corey (fondly referred to as "Philly"), regardless of the windy, rainy weather. So yes, it was good weather for us.

What I'm wearing while being Had by the weather of England: Michael Kors sneakers, Seven for All Mankind jeans, leopard trench from Lord and Taylor, green scarf from Old Navy (from Amandalee!), and Poundland umbrella. I do this to make myself feel special (I mean, why does anyone start a blog? Exactly.)

Bath included various trips to thrift stores that were stuffed to the GILLS of vintage clothing, but I was good and all I got was a silver chain necklace. Philly and I poked our heads into the Jane Austen museum, passed an Eastern Asian art museum, and visited the Fashion Museum as well as the Roman Baths all in one day. The day we arrived was mostly dedicated to finding our hostel and feeling our way around the streets of Bath, seeing the street performers and window shopping. Philly took many magnificent pictures that I will pirate from her so I can show them to my family and friends. That's a heads up, Phil.

Why do I keep posting pictures of me with my mouth wide open?

We had some fun trying on corsets and the skirts at the Fashion Museum. In this picture I'm wearing a gigantic skirt, a hand-me-down brown sweater from Anne and Dan's button down. My jeans are still on.

So...Essex. That was last weekend.

How can I describe Essex? I guess the first step would be to show you the kind of people who live in Essex.

Essentially Jersey girls. With British accents.

In this picture I'm wearing my Topshop romper that my sister doesn't approve of, her hand-me-down hot pink tights, and the silver chain necklace from Bath. By the way the Americans won. You don't beat us at a game we brought to you. It's just not done.

So Beth was kind enough to let Philly and me visit her quaint (and awesome!!) country home in Essex. The English countryside is much prettier during the day with the November sun shining amongst large, cumulus clouds that artists often depict in oil paintings, than, say, at night when it was a deluge of freezing rain. Why yes, we went clubbing in that weather. That would explain my CANCEROUS SOUNDING COUGH but anyway, the residential area of Essex was beautiful even though it was a natural habitat for "chavvy" folk .(Philly and I translated this term as "Jersey girls", "Chongas", and "Guidos".)

And now that I'm done with this post and it's 2:37am, I'll leave you with this new website I've become addicted to: www.cracked.com. It's a "humor" site, and yes, some of the articles/posts are kind of MAD magazine-ish (aimed towards an immature male audience) but most of them are hilarious and even interesting. I've LEARNED things from this website. I read all about the Twilight series without having to actually read the books (another summary, for those who don't have the patience to read witty sarcastic summaries), why a zombie invasion can happen in real life, how badly scarred I was as child, an article even my boyfriend can enjoy. The terrible thing is that when you're done learning something funny/interesting, there are links at the end of each article that will entice you to read with its attention-grabbing headline: Why yes, I'd love to know what six mental illness beliefs Hollywood wants me to believe, or no, I don't know the seven chick flicks that secretly hate women. It just keeps going!

In other words, I'm punishing you by making you stay up as late as I do trying to do work but end up goofing off on the internet. Ha-ha.

Wait, before I go to Bath, about Oxford...

2009-11-05T15:27:00.003-05:00

First, if you remember my entry of Things You Won't Find in My Closet, I mentioned how even though I hate the pants-form of maxi-dresses, I was okay with the idea of rompers.

So today, I'd like to announce that with the help of Beth of Essex, I bought my first romper on sale at Topshop:

She found it and it's fabulous. Even though the one displayed on the website is uber wrinkly. Who is hiring the staff to allow wrinkly clothing pictures on websites?

Anyway, so I figure before I leave for Bath with Philly tomorrow morning I should skim over my adventures in Oxford.

Oxford happened in mid-October the week after Great Yarmouth. I was just too lazy to write about it so here I try:

-I took the wrong tube in my London transfer and miraculously made it to my train on time.

-I enjoyed how close the train station was to the city and didn't have to pay for a bus fare or walk forever.

-I trespassed into Oxford Math Institution gardens (very pretty and yes, I was aware I was in enemy territory as an English major...) and other campus grounds, sneaking in with groups of students.

-I got lost in residential area until Santa wearing a tweed jacket and matching tweed fedora offered to direct me back into town.

-I stayed at a Funky Hostel where the staff was funky, the bedrooms were funky and the prices of beverages at the bar? Awesome. It was funny how I just walked in and asked to spend one night there. "One night?" "Yes, just one." "Um, okay." [insert unnecessary awkwardness here.] As I settled into my room and wandered around, it was apparent that I was the only girl travelling by myself. Everyone else was travelling with other people or if they were travelling alone, they were males.

-I met two Aussies who were kind enough to invite me to spend the next day with them, taking a tour of Oxford Castle (amazing) and Christ Church (Hogwarts) and then we got burgers. Perfect day, right? Of course it was.

-I purchased a large child's Oxford polo shirt for eight pounds after my realization that the rugby shirts were 40 quid. Ew!

-I saw a church that inspired the setting of my southern gothic short story that I turned in today.

Tomorrow I will be travelling with a friend (My mother heaves a sigh of relief) to Bath where we plan on visitng Stonehenge, the Fashion Museum, and the Roman bath houses. We'll probably just wander around a lot too. Who knows.

We'll be back Saturday! Cheers!

Top 3 Reasons You Should Love Collegefashion.net

2009-11-01T14:37:00.002-05:00

I discovered Collegefashion.net because last year I was searching something -- I don't remember what -- about Blair Waldorf and I stumbled across an article of "How to Dress Like Blair Waldorf". Of course I read it.

I started reading other articles written by Zephyr and immediately loved the website. I mean, there are some articles I'm not 100% with (for instance, the DYI t-shirt scarf...maybe I'm not artsy enough to wear something like that. I suppose it's supposed to be coupled with the plaid button-down and leggings) but I'm going to give you the top three reasons to start reading Collegefashion.net if you don't already:

First: The Gossip Girl Fashion Series

These are written by the original writer for CF so you can put your full trust in these articles. Zephyr obviously took a lot of time to study these characters' fashion preferences and as an obsessive viewer of the fabulous, predictable, over-the-top, show that is Gossip Girl, I love them. The articles are meant to help girls who wish to dress as their favorite character or just need fashion inspiration.

Zephyr's series focuses on the fashion of: Serena van der Woodsen, Blair Waldorf (LOVE), the old and new Jenny Humphrey, Georgina Sparks (CRAZY), and Vanessa Abrams (ew).

I wonder if Lizzie McGuire will get her own series? It will have to feature fedoras.

There are also articles written by a new writer of CF, Lisa from Barnard College, of how to dress Gossip Girly for brunettes and blondes for Halloween. They're more about make and hair rather than clothing.

Second: The Top Ten Movies for Fashion Inspiration Series

These are written by one of the new writers for CF, Blair from UNC and I love them! Like the Gossip Girl series, these articles are about finding fashion INSPIRATION from the movies, not necessarily wearing the exact costumes (I mean, I suppose you could if you really wanted to...)

My favorites are Annie Hall, The Talented Mr. Ripley and The Notebook, but there are other movies for differentiating fashion tastes. (Yes, Mallory, Almost Famous is one of them!)

The series is still in the making, but the ones that Blair is writing about are:

-Breakfast at Tiffany's (1961) (Like you had any doubt about that one)
-Bonnie and Clyde (1967)
-Annie Hall (1977)
-The Talented Mr. Ripley (1999)
-Almost Famous (2000)
-The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)
-The Notebook (2004)
-Marie Antoinette (2006)
-Sex and the City (2008) (Again, a shoo-in)
-(500) Days of Summer (2009)

Is anyone else disturbed that The Devil Wears Prada wasn't on Blair's list?

Third: The Basic Articles

I call them the "basic articles" because they are the ones for girls just beginning to find their own style. There are a lot of "how-to" articles and lists:

Ten Fashion Tips That Will Never Go Out of Style
8 Fashion Rules you should Follow
7 Fashion Rules you should Break
How to Find your Perfect Colors
A Girl's Guide to High Heels (3 part series)
Wardrobe Essentials for College Girls
Five Style Mistakes Even Smart Girls Make
7 Ways to Create a Wardrobe that Uniquely Yours

And so on.

These are only three reasons to read CF.net regulary! There are the helpful "What do I wear there?" series, the "Would You Wear [insert trend here]?" and so many others. Enjoy!

Too bad I won't get any recognition for giving them free advertising.

Then again, this blog doesn't get too much traffic, does it?

It's Halloween!

2009-10-31T15:43:00.003-04:00

So I suppose in tradition I should mention something that has to do with spooky things. Um...besides that "boyfriend checklist" tee at H81 (can we say "all the single ladies"?), there's not a lot things that are "scary" that I can think of.

Oh! I'm almost finished with my short story for my gothic genre class. If you'd like a copy of it, I'll send it to you when I'm done. Or I suppose I could do it WAY old school and post it under my Fictionpress account. Ancient!

Things that AREN'T scary: Drag Me to Hell. What a waste. Philly tried to convince me that the director and writers WANTED it to be funny, but justify it as she might, I still think it was just a bad movie. A really bad movie. Now Santa's Slay? THAT is a funny movie.

My hunt for a simple LRD continues and I've been somewhat successful in my quest:

However, I found a Little Blue dress! Fredflare has an adorable little dress I've fallen with.

I think I love it so much because it reminds me of The Notebook, it's simple but feminine and it has pockets. Whoo!

And of course, I have also assembled my wish list from Forever21:

I'm crushed about the nude pumps. But this gives me a chance to find a pair with a pointier toe.

I hope everyone has a Happy Halloween. I'm going as an under-budget Catwoman along with other supervillains such as Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy, and...Batgirl? Whoops.

So before I go lock myself away in the library...

2009-10-30T07:29:00.002-04:00

I was reading this week's HauteLinks at Collegefashion.net and one of the links that struck me featured CNN Money (shock). They organized jobs lists by "most stressful/badly paid", "least stressful jobs" and "top 50 best jobs". In America.

Now I'm not sure if they are 100% on the bullseye, but after surfing internships.com in my free time yesterday, it didn't hurt to browse...

Of course, very few of them specify towards English majors. I mean, there was "College professors", but for anyone who knows me will vouch that I am not a good teaching figure. In fact, the job survey I took back in sophomore year at Roanoke consisted of "advertisement executive" and "military officer" in the top three. I forgot the third one, but I remember my score for being a math teacher was a -12. A negative on a job suggestion? What does that even mean? Not only will I fail at being a math teacher, but unspeakable horrors will come of it? Good grief.

If you've read my Facebook wall, you'll be aware that I (apparently unwillingly) made plans to see Drag Me to Hell tonight with my flatmates. Looks awful. At least Justin Long's in it. I really liked him in He's Just Not that Into You. The link is a trailer for that movie - I laughed out loud. I love Kevin Connolly. Please watch Cooper at 3:00 too.

Last link of the day before I start isolating myself to writing NOT for my entertainment and for others, at least Farmington/Hartford area isn't on the list.

Because Forever 21 doesn't HAVE internships...

2009-10-29T15:15:00.000-04:00

Dear Forever 21,

I have decided that you need to hire me. I am familiar with the store's merchandise, the vastness of your demographic, and your marketing strategies. I feel as though I would have a lot to offer to the company.

First, you would need to start reconsidering who you are putting in charge of the photos for the Twelve by Twelve merchandise on your website. Regardless that most of the items of clothing you sell through the Twelve by Twelve line do not appeal to me, it is no excuse for using poorly sewn examples to market them. It is clearly evident in some of the clothing that there is messy stitching and wrinkled material where there SHOULDN'T be, which no doubt affects the consideration of purchasing from most of your customers.

Secondly, whoever is in charge of deciding what trends Forever 21 should market needs to speak with me before making a decision because I can tell you exactly which products are going to go straight to the "sale" rack and which ones will be sold out online within a day. Seriously, elastic waist jeans? If consumers really wanted to follow that trend, they could have gone to their attics and dust off those pants they wore in the first grade.

Third, I love your store.

Please consider this as my application essay for your non-existing internship.

Love,
Elisabeth

Great Yarmouth, Fashion Disasters, and Shout out to F21

2009-10-27T11:15:00.006-04:00

So earlier this month I took a quick train to Great Yarmouth to see the North Sea. It was nice to see the coast and it was fun walking up and down the boardwalk of carnival rides and greast food stands. My adventure there didn't bring me as much excitement as Cambridge did, but I did get eat a fresh doughnut, took lots of pictures and meandered through the streets of the marketplace. It was surreal to see so many old churches and lovely architecture be surrounded and overrun by cheap beach toy shops and souvenier stands. Please refer to my Facebook photo album for visuals.

I liked to picture Yarmouth during the summer time, when the place would no doubt be most populous with families and teens taking up every inch of sand on the beach, filling up the numerous parking lots I walked passed and creating long lines for rides like the Ferris Wheel and the rollercoaster. The pedestrian streets had lines of lightbulbs hanging over the street - they probably looked very pretty during summer nights. I do wish I had gone with someone to have dinner with or see a greyhound race with but oh well. More exciting things happened in Oxford.

On a completely different note, I'd like to indulge you with more complaints about clothing - this time, the things I've seen on UEA campus.

Today, I was sitting in one of my classes and realized that the girl sitting three seats down from me had a HUGE deoderant stain on the back of her right shoulder. How did it get there? Why hasn't she noticed it? Why didn't any of her friends check her before she left the living residence? Why didn't I say anything? Because I didn't know her, we were in the middle of class and there was no discreet way of filling her in. I felt bad, but that's why you check yourself before leaving to go out in public.

Yesterday, a girl in my class was wearing a beret. Okay, yes, even though I don't really feel them, knit/yarn berets or as a scuzzy boy told me while I was waiting at JFK (long story >.>), "granny hats" are very in.

What's really awkward is that I once had a bright orange slouchy yarn hat but apparently I was too ahead of the trend, convinced that it looked like a deflated pumpkin, and gave it away.

However, when your wear a SEQUINED beret, and I don't mean a slightly embellished one like the CR example, but COATED in LARGE SEQUINS, you look silly. It's the kind of silly you're going to be showing pictures of yourself to your children or just look back on and think why the hell was I wearing a sequin beret? I should have seen this horrid thing coming when Vampie and I first saw that goddamn rainbow sequined beret at F21! If you're going to wear a knit beret, fine, it's your style, it's the trend, go for it. But please don't flash the trend in my face with your tacky sequined beret that most likely feels like you have lice from being so itchy. GOD.

And for the last time, stop wearing cowboy fringe like some girls on this campus. It was in for a week and those who had the common sense to ignore it now have to suffer when you go stomping around in your boots that would look nice if it weren't for your stupid fringe swinging all over the place. If you don't believe me, believe 'Zaar. Unless you're a cowgirl, fringe is a no go. Same with denimn on denim pieces. Why do I always find people who argue with me about this? It's not hard. Just don't do it. Ever. "But it's the same shade!" No. Just don't do it.

I'm not done. I need to have a word with Forever 21.

Dear Forever 21,

I love your store. I've converted a number of my friends to go there first for shopping and I probably know more about the merchandise and the store itself than most of your employers.

However, we need to talk.

I would appreciate it if you would stop putting holes in my shoes. It is winter and I don't want my toes to be cold. I know I could wear some fun tights or socks, but it would really just be better off that we transition from cute summer/autumn peep toes to...you know...not peep toes.

And enough with the tiered dresses and skirts. They aren't all that flattering. This trend will pass and all will be well again. Trust me.

That is all.

Love,
Elisabeth

"It's the Cheesiest!"

2009-10-06T14:12:00.002-04:00

After three consecutive "I miss you"s on my facebook wall, I assumed it was time to update. Yes, I miss you too.

However tonight I was blessed with half a blue box of cheesy ecstacy - oh Kraft, how you warm my heart. Philly's parents mailed her a box as a reminder that America is Home sweet home and she was kind enough to share it with me. I have followed Philly's example by asking my sister to mail me a box of mac+cheese as well - and perhaps some goldfish. There are no snacks that smile back at me here. I mean, besides Hobnobs. I'm pretty sure they smile at me.

After discovering I didn't have two presentations due in my gothic class at all and then being reminded (for the first time) that I have a close reading due Friday, you'd think I'd be a little more agitated. Wrong! I've already planned out my paper and still riding on my wave of smugness after receiving a good grade on the poem previously mentioned. Only problem is that I have to keep the bar high and hope the gothic assignment will be okay since there is little to no rubric for it. >.>

Gossip girl viewing session is happening tonight and all of the girls - and NG - are pumped. I'm thinking Wales will watch with us if we bother him enough ("I like the part when he stops moving!"). We have no TV and since it airs in America at the equivalent of 2:00am here, we found it best to wait until Tuesday night to make sure all of the girls are here so we can pack into Beth's room and squeal about Blair and Chuck and talk over Nate's pointless storyline. And for the first time, Vanessa actually adds something to the plot instead of being whiny and messing shit up.

I want to go somewhere else this week but I'm not sure where to - perhaps I'll tough out the 3 hour train ride to Oxford (Dylan and Mo: "HA!!") or wait 'til the weekend to go to London and really look around. Suggestions?

Fun fact: I skyped my family last night and found out that Fortinbras is HUGE, as well as loving the fact that his ears perked up when I called his name through Ted's computer. Good boy for remembering mummy's voice. I'm hoping my webcam will be delivered to me this month so I can actually web chat with people again!

"Why is everyone here a gourmet chef?"

2009-10-03T13:56:00.006-04:00

There are three Americans in my flat (including myself) and I haven't seen Sophia cook a lot, but I know for a fact that Philly and I had issues when we started living in conditions where we had to make our own dinners. While we were two classic college kids - helpless without the microwave - it looked as though everyone else (British) had specifically taken cooking classes in preparation of living in a flat this year.

I remember going shopping with some of the guys ("lads") from STC and while they were picking out cooking ingredients (carrots, potatoes, pasta, various meats, etc) I was looking at basic things like eggs, bread, milk, and peanut butter, as well as instant meals. Philly has been brave and started making her own pasta - I suppose I should jump on the bandwagon and learn to cook my own meat. A pair of my skinny jeans (levis) are no longer considered my "skinny" jeans anymore. Better eat! I'm still worried about burning something...and by something I mean everything and anything.

My notes for the previously mentioned assignment have increased and to prove I've been completing other assignments, here's a poem I wrote for the poetry class:

"Wooden floors"

So long since silence soothed these ears

The floor snarled and whined so often

Whether I was trodding, or creeping – so often

The riotous foundation became…silence

“Don’t fix what’s not broken,” I’m advised,

“Let the floor be until you can’t stand anymore.”

So I stand.

But I’m restless.

The floor and I are the same –

The perfect match.
As loud as the floor promises never to break,

The buckling and creaking cause my fear

Of one day falling through.

“Don’t fix it.”

“Don’t break it.”

But I’m restless.

I tread to something new. Something quiet.

I press my ears to the wood, listening for assurance.

Not a sound. How promising.

Behind me, the floor groans in my absence still, wondering where I went.

I continue to pace on solid silence. I’ll go back…eventually.

So long since silence soothed these ears.

So quiet I tread, no one even knows I’m here.

Brief recesses of Tetris = better thinking

2009-10-03T09:44:00.002-04:00

This weekend I realized that I am actually required to do some expository writing for one of my classes and two pieces of such are due this Monday. Hm. You mean I'm not on a three month vacation?

Collecting my materials, I'm reading the questions asked of me:

"In Romantics, Rebels and Revolutionaries (1981) Marilyn Butler argued that ‘Otranto looks uncommonly like an attempt to graft onto the novel – the modern form concerned with money, possessions, status, circumstance - the heightened passions, elemental situations and stylised poetic techniques of the Elizabethan dramatists’ (p.21). Explore the relationship between early gothic as a genre and the writing of the Elizabethan dramatists"

What?

My mind has turned to absolute rubbish (+2 assimilation points) over the summer and that extra month given to me to just hang around and read a lot. I read the question twice and literally hear the wheels screech as they become active again. Relate the gothic genre to Elizabethan dramatists' writing style. Okay, that's not too hard. As I have been taught, I scribble ideas and facts and scratch out lines to make them coherent. A few minutes later, I'm staring blankly at a white screen with an impatient blinking line, waiting to see if I have anything worthwhile to write. I don't. Somehow I want to relate Kurt Vonnegut's explaination of drama to my presentation but I can't find a way to link it correctly. I play Tetris and suddenly things become clearer. I write a few more sentences then play Tetris again. Of course! Tetris makes you smarter.

How silly of me to think I could just dive headfirst into academic writing again without playing a few rounds of Tetris Sprint first. Ridiculous.

In other news, I've been invited to a silent disco the 23rd. Thoughts?

Adventures in Cambridge or "There's no such place as CAHMbridge, it's CAYMbridge."

2009-10-01T12:55:00.002-04:00

First of all, I would like to apologize for the butt pictures I was unnecessarily tagged in. Please remember I live in a freshmen dorm and those shenanigans that we found funny back in 2007 are still fresh to the blokes in my hall. Well, except for Vampie. We all know she laughed hysterically. The duct tape? I think it speaks for itself.

It's very hard for me to not have a positive outlook on life when Lady luck follows me around for an entire day - such as October 1st, 2009. I always remember and appreciate all of my good fortune because when it runs out, at least it didn't run out at a less convenient time.

For instance:
-Type-A Elisabeth, as she heads to the bus stop, notes the cloudy weather, slight drizzle and her sniffling nose and realizes she didn't even bother checking the weather for that day in Cambridge or bring in an umbrella. Result: weather clears up, it's sunny all day.

-Brilliant Elisabeth, as she was throwing her belongings in a bag, realizes she forgot her railcard AFTER purchasing round trip tickets to Cambridge under it. Result: conductor doesn't ask for it. Twice.

-Wary Elisabeth, as she is about to cross the street to check out Emmanuel college, forgets in her zeal that she needs to look the other way and OMGSOCLOSE almost gets nailed by a bus. Result: Doesn't.

-Sneaky Elisabeth, as she is trying to trespass into the Clare college, gets stopped and is asked if she is a student. Result: A man mistakes the question directed to him and announces that "they" (his small posse of adults) are with "him". Elisabeth somehow is blanketed under this general "them" and manages to mosey in without further questioning.

-Clever Elisabeth, as she is hanging out in the Clare common room reading Mysteries of Udolpho, is bombarded with questions from a pushy, newly moved-in grad student about what she's studying and where she is staying. She is unable to think quick on her feet and replies in vague, terse answers. Result: Grad student translates these responses as "turn downs" and leaves her be. This is also considered another episode of Elisabeth being incredibly socially awkward.

The list goes on, but it would've been consistent of what could have gone wrong; AKA a mother's list: "You could have been kidnapped, bound, gagged and thrown in the river walking at night by yourself!"

Cambridge is a magnificent place - I had spent the first few hours just ambling the streets, exploring colleges open to tourists, poking my head into churches, and browsing malls and street vendors alike. The malls and students there are just as wonderful. After I had managed to sneak in Clare, I came across Rudi, an American grad student who was impressed by my smooth methods of breaching campuses. He was studying European history (among other subjects), very eloquent, and was kind enough to invite me to go "punting" with his friends. We waited with Tobias, a German math student, and Rachel, an American music theory student, for Aiden, an Englishman, to change his shoes. I apologize, Aiden, for not remembering what you were studying. If you read this, please let me know.

"[Cricket] is 3D, five-day chess. Like baseball, but better." - Aiden

The four of them were able to reserve a punting boat (for free) and all we had to do was carry the punting rod (pole?) and seat cushions to the dock by the bridge with stone spheres. Aiden punted most of the way and on the way back, we all took turns trying it out. Rudi insists I was doing just fine until I gave up after introducing the front of the boat to the wall. (By the way, I learned that "punting from the Cambridge end" is a euphemism). Tobias, the most reluctant of us to try punting, was the best at it (of course) and afterwords we retired to the common room to sit, read and relax. Insert pushy grad student moment here:

PGS: So what are you studying here?
Myself: History.
PGS: Anything specific?
Myself: Nope, just general History.
PGS: Ah.
Myself: I'm a very boring and vague person.
Rudi: What else to expect from Connecticut.

PGS: So are you living on this campus or elsewhere?
Myself: Pardon?
PGS: Where are you living?
Myself: ...
PGS: ...
Myself: Here.

Watching myself being socially awkward must have been exhausting because after a brief trip to Sainsbury's, we gathered at Rachel's residence for a home-cooked meal of tortellini, chicken and radishes. It was surrealistic what fortune my day had brought me to result a great meal with intelligent, interesting people. Cambridge is absolutely grand and I hope to return soon during my time in England.

Special thanks to NG for insisting that I should stop waiting for someone to go with me on my travels and just go. It would not have been the same.

Back from Hiatus

2009-09-30T11:50:00.000-04:00

Back by popular demand (one person), I'm now writing again in this...thing.

For those who don't know by now, I'm spending a semester at the University of East Anglia in Norwich, England as an exchange student. I'm a junior in a freshmen dorm ("terrace") and from on I'll be calling it STC. The building is divided into blocks and built for students to creep in on each other at any time of the day. As beautiful as the lake is that my large bay-ish window overlooks, the view of other floors' kitchens can be far more entertaining. The kitchens are all windows with no curtains so it is best advised that you go for a late-night snack NOT in your underwear. Unless you're the residential "Naked Guy". All buildings have that one guy who doesn't wear clothes. STC has one as well. He graces us with shorts most of the time.

When I'm not in the kitchen using Wales' camera to zoom in on other flats and creep, I spend time in my room reading for class or hanging out with my flatmates. Last week I finished "The Castle of Otranto" (excellent) and now for my Gothic class I'm reading "The Mysteries of Udolpho". It's considerably thicker than the last so I'm pleased I have a week to read it. It makes me marvel how I inhaled the Harry Potter books within four hours (at a time) whilst it takes me days to read a book about the same size.

I've engrossed myself in the British culture as much as possible. Last night the girls in my flat (including RugBe, Philly, Mo'Nique and Brownie) watched the latest episode of Gossip Girl online (OMFG GEORGINA IS KER-RAAYZEEEE!) and then we forced Wales, Pong, Bobby and the other guys to watch Mean Girls on a website provided by Katie Orange. Many thanks, Orange.

Oh yeah, the British culture - even though I've become accustomed to drinking tea (more) and eating biscuits, I still snicker when a bunch of young adult men are goofing off in the hall and one of them suggests tea and toast as a snack. And they have it. Someone agree with me.

I've kicked around a "football" with the guys, gushed over RugBe's latest purchases from TopShop, and drank Guiness from tap. (Want to die).

I recently got my railcard so I plan on travelling as much as possible...as soon as I know where I want to go >.> Suggestions please?

Forever 21 - why?

2009-08-17T00:42:00.000-04:00

Forever 21, my favorite store, has been letting me down lately. These recent mishaps have been getting on my nerves and now I'm going to voice them as respectfully as I can. The list I'm about to provide are my questionings of Forever 21's taste in attire to advertise as "fashion".

Unfortunately the first item I cannot find a picture of, but please believe me when I ask you to go to Forever Love at the Westfarms Mall by the Starbucks stand and look for this THING they're trying to sell: rainbow sequined berets. What. The. Hell. This wasn't a "few scattered sequins" - this beret was the kind sold at halloween costume warehouses. This didn't belong there. Daylynn will vouch for me when I say we saw a RAINBOW SEQUIN BERET. Christ.

Second item: The Sprinkle skirt. Just because you love sprinkles doesn't mean you should wear them. Even worse, elasic waist.

While we're at it, third item: Elastic waist jeans. Okay, maybe if you are in elementary school. Or pregnant. But seriously, what?

Then this made things even worse: The Parka article.

"How do you wear a Parka? You don't." - Daylynn

As Daylynn and I also observed, Forever 21 has been abusing plaid and peep toe shoes. Not all shoes need to have a peep toe. In fact, this french bootie would be just PERFECT without a peep toe. And this outburst of plaid not only makes me reminisce of my days of plaid skirts that I voluntarily wore in high school and lumberjacks, but also makes me vow to not wear anything plaid. Think I'm extreme? I don't even go to an overly liberal and artsy college where plaid (or even better, GINGHAM) is like a uniform. Why not add the scarf?

Have you worn a plaid shirt and leggings yet?

I have seen this look so often I don't even think it's a personal style anymore - it's not even main stream, it's now like a uniform for girls. Look, this outfit is cute but I believe girls really need to try going beyond the basic plaid/leggings/scarf trend and really try to make it their own. Because of my distaste for plaid I prefer to wear solid or striped button-downs. Try ditching the scarf (unless its cold) for a long necklace (or layer them!). Add a belt and please don't wear that button down plaid shirt that's short enough to COMPLETELY expose your ass that you think is being modest beneath tight leggings; you really look insecure about yourself and demand everyone to gape at your butt. I say this because at my school, girls do this often and they look terrible. Leggings are a step up from tights, but they are not pants. As far as I'm concerned, the ass could be peeking out a little but should not be on parade in your dumb leggings. If you want your ass to be the main display of your existan-BODY, then wear yoga pants. I'll just wait to see you on What Not to Wear.

Oh, and Forever 21? The late 80's and early 90's fashion you're trying to sell? Don't. A girl will never be attractive because of a huge shirt, a manly vest, and elastic waist jeans. I'm just holding my breath for the return of the catsuit. Avoid that bandwagon and throw rotten fruit at it!

A personal shopper? I wish.

2009-08-14T15:55:00.000-04:00

A few days ago, I had to honor and pleasure to meet my good friend Daylynn at the mall and as usual, good times were had. Explorations abound.

After ransacking the Forever 21 stores and Daylynn's purchase of the ringmaster jacket (observe), we ventured into Bebe, a clothing store I had never set foot in. Mostly because the prices of the products were daunting, but as we perused the aisles, it became very apparent that the store was a little...well...embellished.

Bebe.com

To say "embellished" is a bit of an understatement.

We had fun with it though. We imagined all of the scenerios of where we would wear the more outrageous ones (like this ostrich feather skirt and vest we pictured as an ensemble). I tried on a dress for fun and Daylynn was kind enough to record one of my less fabulous moments.

Tres chic with the flip flops.

But beyond the sequins, glitter and other unnecessary embellishments, Bebe does offer some clothing that I would wear in public, like this blazer. The store is a hit-or-miss, but if you do find yourself browsing, just keep in mind that if you're going to splurge outside of your Old Navy/H+M/Forever21 bubble, you might as well try Bebe for something different. Bebe is not for the inconpicuous - you've been warned.

More ways Disney ruins colors for me.

2009-08-06T22:18:00.000-04:00

Sifting through Glamour's fashion articles, there was a piece about the outbreak of outrageous neon colors that brightened up the runways (including Michael Kors - cheers!) and so after watching the "how to" video, here's my take on fall day-glo wear:

Neon pink is obviously going to be one of the biggest colors for this neon trend, but I think if I were to follow this style, I'd lean more towards cooler colors. (Cool neon colors? Oxymoronic?) I'd probably try the fuschia, blue or green (even the orange!) but neon yellow (or green/yellow) makes me think of large highway/street signs that direct traffic. The color is loud and bold but I'm not sure everyone can pull off the look. I strongly feel this trend is going to be brief because of the 80's relapse so my suggestion is to not get too carried away with collecting neon attire. However, a statement coat would be fun this season - to take a break from navy, brown and other neutral colored coats...

And for anyone who's ever watched enough Disney channel from past years will understand that this color surge isn't new:

And I'm hesitant to start wearing clothing similar to angsty teen individuals:

I don't hate Hot Topic, its just too easy to tease.

So if I'm going to partake in this neon trend, I firmly believe it should be one invesment piece. Like Michael Kors or that little Versace number.

Nice.

And what's sad? John Hughes' death during the return (with a vengence!) of the 80's fashion.

If you don't know who John Hughes is, you do. You just didn't know you knew.

"All eyes on me in the center of the ring..."

2009-08-06T09:38:00.000-04:00

Everyone's in a tizzy about this new schtick F21 has going on that's circus themed. It's as if they thought to themselves: "How can we take something totally outrageous like the circus and make it so people would wear in it the streets?"

F21's Facebook

Um, well, they did it. And apparently fashion magazines and blogs alike are buzzing compliments about these frilly, striped and bowed themed clothes.

Honestly? Not a huge fan. I think there are a few items I would buy if my money sitch wasn't as tight as it is: I like the "ringmaster dress" and what used the "ringmaster jacket" (I don't have an ego issue, I can't help what they name the attire that I like) but other than that, it doesn't necessarily fit my "style", which still kind of remains a mystery. Props to the adventurous ones who pull off the circus folk look.

Just wondering: is anyone reminded of Hot Topic at all? By any of these? Just a little?

How to survive a muggy summer day in CT

2009-07-30T09:21:00.000-04:00

You don't.

The only way to enjoy a heavy, sticky summer day in CT is to treat it like a snow day - stay inside. Just put on the A/C and lose the sweater in this case. However, it is often very sunny on these muggy days and some will bear the weighted air and lay outside to tan. And if you can't stand feeling horrendously sticky, you can always go to tanning bed, lest you became one shade lighter for staying indoors for a few hours.

I read Collegefashion.net's article on tanning beds and I feel like it's becoming Fark now. How often have you read about the dangers of tanning salons? How often did you not care? The media, health-oriented people, and reasonable human beings keep telling tanorexics that tanning beds are BAD but they don't seem to realize that teen girls and velour track-suit wearing middle agers DON'T GIVE A CRAP.

I've been among these somewhat orange species since high school (I can't recall if tanning beds were a "thing" at Renbrook - I highly doubt it) and either they are illiterate and can't read the multitude of warnings against tanning beds, or they just don't care. Why worry about a future death of skin cancer when you can be tan and attractive in the present? High school and college students are often in a trance that they are immortal; they have other things to worry about like making honors again or why Johnny didn't text me after last night. Who has time to worry about skin cancer? That's like - pfttt - a bazillion years from now.

A justification I hear for frequent tanning bed visits is that they won't die of skin cancer "before something else gets me". Seriously? Most of the girls who are addicted to tanning beds - the ones I know anyway - do not give off "daredevil" vibes. "Before something else gets me"? Like what? Do you go motorcycling over shark-infested tanks at 500 ft in the air inbetween exams? Do you tame lions in the student lounge? Are you hoping for some kind of glamourous end besides an embarrassing death from skin cancer that could have been easily prevented? What are you thinking?

Here's my guess: my generation is horrifically vain. If you don't believe me, go on Facebook or Myspace and count all of those pictures of being taken by one person of just him/her from thirty different angles. And guess what? None of those are a profile picture. That's just one example. Use your imagination to think of how else people are vain. (Their blogs...?)

People are vain in their own way. Some people need to be tan, some people need to have plastic surgery, and some need to be wearing the right outfit (that's me).

Yet my form of vanity doesn't risk death. Just bankruptcy.

Even so, there is no right outfit for muggy days anyway because everything makes you sticky and uncomfortable. Just stay inside and read blogs that tell you have to live your life.

The Unlikely Staple.

2009-07-24T19:41:00.000-04:00

Ever since I saw Alicia Keys in the "My Boo" music video, I fell in love with her "jacket over nightgown" look.

I got these images from a Youtube.

Nice.

Now I'm not saying I traipse around in just a slinky nightie in public, but I have found all kinds of ways to wear a chemise dress: as a peeking slip (to take that "revealed bra" trend up a notch) under a tunic (like that F21 Shibuya Mon Amore Owl tunic), a tank top under a button down (some buttons undone) with pants/skirt/shorts, and if it's a cotton chemise, why not just add a light jacket or a cardigan with a belt and fake it as an actual dress?

Take it from someone who likes to sleep in, I often roll out of bed and rush to class or, more importantly, breakfast during the school year and I like to wear my sleepwear in class!...In proper fashion, of course. You don't want to look like you just took the walk of shame.

The secret is to keep the dress chemise discreet, yet intriguing, like a shy lacy tank top. Unless you are actually lounging in the privacy of your own lounge space, make sure the chemise is mostly covered to avoid looking like a wanna-be Moulan Rouge preformer.

As my shameless advertising of Forever 21 continues, here are some samples of slips that are within price range, with some other stores that I sometimes go to:

Absolute laziness, yet always tired.

2009-07-22T09:36:00.000-04:00

It's alarmingly busy and yet lazy work to watch a puppy. Training an 8 week old bulldog to NOT pee on tile floor and do that outside is a job tht requires me sitting a lot in the kitchen, no opportunity of napping, and running back and forth between the back yard and the kitchen every twenty minutes or so. I haven't been able to think of topics to write about lately so while Fortinbras is sleeping, here's a sigh of relief for me:

The Dreaded Anna Sui "Gossip Girl" line for Target. Of Doom.

The second picture I've knicked from CF.net

When I found out about this, I was stricken with grief. Mass produce a cheap clothing line that barely reflects the characters' fashion taste? Awful. Gossip Girl inspired, I suppose, but Gossip Girl is all about the world of wearing an unlimited collection of high-priced, high-quality clothing daily and thinking nothing of it. A clothing line for Target doesn't inspire the same feeling of quality fabric. Gossip Girl fashion is meant to be elite, and diluting this notion through mass-produced copies for make-shift "Serenas" and "Blairs" disappointed me.

However, thanks to Collegefashion.net, I am assured that the name of Gossip Girl will no longer be associated with Target, since the allignment with the TV series was too promiscuous and plain dramatic. As silly as I believe that sounds ("Wearing this wanna-be Serena outfit inspires me to do cocaine and kill someone!") , I'm glad Gossip Girl fashion will remain in its white tower rather than join the ranks of, say, Xhiliration. Best believe Blair Waldorf would not wear that brand. Ick.

My sister has only been watching GG this summer to catch up on its magical world of teenage adults and independently wealthy (and wise) teenagers, and I think it's fair to say I can only watch the series by myself. Other than Mo, I cannot watch GG with anyone else because anyone else is sane enough to keep quiet and listen to the dialogue of what's going on. I prefer to yell at Vanessa for being so annoying, laugh at how pointless yet beautiful Chace Crawford's character is sometimes, and swoon over the Blair and Chuck relationship. I find this perfectly acceptable because the show's predictability allows me to talk over some dialogue and find out later what's going on. I love Gossip Girl.

For those with money and even more obsessed than I, there's always the Gossip Girl tees sold at Fredflare.com. Hooray!

Fredflare.com

I was reminded at midnight why I go to HP movie premieres.

2009-07-15T23:49:00.001-04:00

So, yeah, I am a fan of Harry Potter - without the wands, the home-made Quidditch robes or any other nonsense accessories other than the books - and I did go with my girlfriends to see Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. We were those girls - don't worry, we were in t-shirts and jeans, not in full costume unlike some die-hard characters - at ten o'clock for good seat at a midnight showing and got home at 3:00 this morning.

I believe it was the best Harry Potter movie thus far. I think the scenes that focused on the humorous (and sometimes heartbreaking) social lives of the students was a nice break from the dark, heavy tone from the fifth movie. The balance between comedy and action/drama was well done and even if you're not a Harry Potter fan, at least see the movie when it comes to DVD for two characters: Luna Lovegood and Cormac McLaggen.

Luna Lovegood is absolutely adorable. Every scene she's in, my friends and I aww'd and ooh'd (endearingly) because she's so sweet, quirky and cute. Her little dress to Slughorn's Christmas party was so funky I won't be surprised if Forever 21 comes out with a similiar cocktail dress in a few weeks. Hooray for Evanna Lynch and her acting skills.

And now, for McLaggen.

Cormac = Grade-A Tool. And I love it.

I didn't pay a lot of attention to Cormac in my initial reading of HP6 - however, Freddie Stroma took McLaggen's role to a whole new level of pompous prick. I thought McLaggen was just a bull-headed jock, but Stroma made me wish McLaggen was in every scene. He was hilarious! He made a simple role of being a catalyst for Hermione and Ron's romance into a role of comedic assholeness. His hotness almost stole Tom Felton's spotlight. FYI, there were girls in the audience who cried when Malfoy got hexed brutally in the bathroom scene.

The New York Times, however, were crying in the audience because of their impatience with the movie and its upcoming two-part finale of the Harry Potter adventure. TNYT whines about the lag between books and movies, making the franchise slow and tedious. I beg to differ because I find it smart of Warner Bros to make two movies to break up the ending to make more money and to keep the Harry Potter craze alive. Because, Dargis, once it's over, it's over. The fans who were read the book to in elementary school have been living with Harry Potter for years and it's the impatient, weary consumers like you who want this "fad" to be over with and look for something new to bite and swallow without savoring it. The Harry Potter trend is something to be inhaled. When the final movie comes out, it'll be over and the fans - the casual like me and the die-hard alike - will have nothing left of J.K. Rowling's tale to look forward to. Except for those who have turned to the Twilight series for cheap literature security. You and your teen vampire smut obsession sicken me.

Enough personal stuff, here's something you should read:

2009-07-14T00:18:00.000-04:00

For those who are truly fashion savvy, labels aren't everything. However, your wardrobe wouldn't hurt from a few discounted designer items.

I introduce to you: HauteLook.com. If you haven't heard of it yet, you should. It's been on CNN and Fox (among others) and if you're the kind of shopper who's like my sister and saves up money for one nice, expensive piece of attire at a time, here's a website for you.

Here's how it works: designer items are sold for a limited time (the countdown is advertised clearly) at ridicuously low prices. Up to 75% off? Yes. If they don't have any designers you care for, just wait for the next set of sales to come up. Simple as that.

We should give a great thanks for my friend and fellow cheerleader, Emma, for introducing this site to me.

Hautelook.com

Go there. Seriously.

Several things.

2009-07-13T22:44:00.000-04:00

Back from the soreness of my wisdom toothless-jaw, there are several things I'd like to announce.

-I finally bought those grey skinny jeans and that studded dress from Express. The salesgirl there had funky circle glasses (hopefully for style...?) and reassured me that she owned the same tank dress, has partied and slept in it, and the studs have not fallen off. Leaving with TMI and forty dollars poorer, I'm hoping this dress is still a good investment.

-I also got a leopard print trench coat (CRAZY) from the sale rack at Lord and Taylor. When I go abroad for a semester in England, I will not be camoflauged. Or maybe I will. I'm not really sure what they wear in England. I've been looking up websites of what's in style in England and all I'm left with is an impression that they dress like Harry Potter or tweed. Not helpful.

-I visited my big sister in New York and had a fabulous walk around Batterson park. I think it would be amazing if I could just spontaneously grab a friend and take a bus for NYC for the day. Oh and people were riding bikes there. With baskets.

-There will be a new member of my family by the end of this week. His name is Fortinbras.

I did not name him.

My parents mulled over naming him Handsome Dan, but it felt cliche and besides, how would I explain the name of our new bulldog to my boyfriend...?

-Quick thing: Since spring, I've had this newfound interest in collecting stationary. I actually write letters so this kind of pertains to my hobbies - I've acquired a pretty hefty collection of stylish boxes with letters that have New Yorker cat covers, old Vogue art covers and even quaint paintings of dogs (my mother took all of the bulldog letters). I think letter-writing should come back in style because it's more personal, classy, and fun to send and receive them.

Things that should not come back in style are shoulder pads. But that's just me. Everything else on that list is fine, but come on, women benefitting from shoulder pads? (See bottom of article) Please pass.

Seriously, check out that panties link. So cute!

2009-07-10T02:13:00.001-04:00

I am watching (and participating in) a debate of Forever 21 fashion involving devout Christians.

Wow.

It is easy to forget the store's Christian values that are printed on the bottom of their bags, even though it's hard to reflect those values through young adult clothing whose origins are L.A. Face it, kids, the bag is meant to reflect the faith of the owner of Forever 21, not try to enforce the faith through the actual materials sold, nor evangalize youths. Don't punish the non-Christians for purchasing cute, cheap clothes that are less than church friendly and Dani, don't complain about subtle hints of Christian faith in places you don't even look.

These aren't pamphlets forced in your hand, street preachers in your face, or Gideon Bibles you try to avoid being handed while walking across campus to your class. It's just a bag. Jews can buy Forever 21 merchandise too.

Do-Won Chang is just giving you a heads up of his religion. Don't get your $3.80 panties in a twist.

I'm with the band...sometimes.

2009-07-09T12:30:00.000-04:00

For those who haven't noticed the link, here's a little description of the band, Left to Tell.

Not emo.

They are a band that have been making it up the ranks in popularity in the CT area, their repertoire of gigs ranging from Toad's Place, Shamrock Cafe and various Hot Topic stores. When I'm not at college or working a shift at my job, I go their shows.

I'd define their music as alternative rock and if you like alternative rock music or feel super cool when you listen to new bands before they sell out, I encourage you to check out their website and music. They have upcoming shows at the Hot Topic at Milford Mall, July 17th at 7:00 with the Kicking Daisies, and Norton Park in Plainville, July 18th at 6:00.

Toad's Place, Dec. 2008

I don't feel bad advertising them because I know that those who live in CT have few plans on weekends. I'm just trying to help you out.

For summer concert wear, check out The Skinny. Rock out in...bikinis and high waisted skirts. Um. Yep.

Thunder + biking = questionable.

2009-07-07T23:38:00.000-04:00

Imagine tanning in your back yard, soaking in the rays, and hearing thunder in the air. I was glad I didn't have work today because riding my bike during an impending storm seemed possibly fatal. Yes, I do ride a bike to work on account of good weather. I find it curious how often people find that admirable like I'm making a statement when I confess that I ride a bike for a half-hour trek to work that should be fifteen minutes by car. I'm not actively trying to get in shape, I'm not trying to save money -- I'm just trying to get by having a summer job with no car of my own.

Lucky for me, bicycles are "in style" - I don't understand how they could be out of style because they do wonders for your body, they're fun to go around in and hippy activists will bless you for saving the environment. Nonetheless, page 32 in July 2009 Bazaar and Vogue are all over this fad, encouraging women to be chic and pedal around town in fancy and/or vintage bicycles with designer bags. And apparently heels.

My bike does not looks this cool.

I ride my mother's old bike from the 80's (possibly earlier) with three gears and tires not meant for rocky terrain. It is similar to this picture I Googled:

Not as rusty.

I mean, sure bikes aren't fun when you're going several towns over, when the weather is bad, or when you need to carpool people. However, going over just to visit a friend or pick up a few things at the store will help you "go green" and be good exercise. To make your bike more useful and cute like Mary-Kate:

Where's Toto?

...You can purchase cute bike baskets at REI.com or cheaper ones at Target, K-Mart, and Amazon.com.

REI.com, $34.00 Target, $49.99 Amazon, $9.96

Simple wire baskets can come as cheap as twelve dollars! And if you want to get back in touch with your childhood, try a flowery mini basket. And of course, if the first step you need to take is to have a bicycle, there's always good ol' wikiHow to show you the way on How to Choose a Bicycle.

"...SUCH a college student."

2009-07-07T02:25:00.000-04:00

I once had a phone conversation with my sister and as usual, I asked for her advice of what to wear to a social outing, which quickly became a conversation about our closet-building techniques. My sister's preference was to buy very expensive items of clothing and wear them all the time, forever (or, at least until they're out of style). Let it be known my sister is beyond her college years and thrives in the busy streets of cities such as Chicago and New York. I told her I like to keep a wide variety of cheap clothing handy for different occasions. She scoffed at me, pegging me as "such a college student", to which I could only raise my eyebrow and reply, "Um, yeah."

I'm going into my third year of college and my wardrobe, slimming down as it is, is still pretty vast. The collection of clothes are for all kinds of styles, occasions, and "emergencies" that I've found pretty useful, especially for themed parties and other outings.

Here's a (very) brief list I'm compiled as "last-minute" party clothes for the socially active (possibly alcoholic) college student.

Hoops/Big earrings - Make your laziest outfit look like you tried with these. Sitting around in a tank top and jeans? Big earrings = "hey, where are you going tonight?" [WARNING: may not be the case for those who regularly wear large earrings]
Shiny/vibrant shoes - really shouldn't have to justify this one. If all you have are non-metallic, boring colored shoes in your closet, how do you think that affects your mood?

Jersey-knit dresses - As much as I harass anything that has any link to New Jersey (including one of my best friends, Dylan), Jersey-knit dresses are beer-spill friendly and easy to clean. I have a couple of these cheap, fun party dresses that I throw in the washer and hang-dry. Because I love to shamelessly advertise, Forever 21, Charlotte Russe and even (though rarely) Wet Seal are the first stores my girls and I head to for something cheap and cute for parties.
Animal print dress - A good animal print dress can be a show-stopper and provide as a cop-out animal costume. Speaking of cop-out, why not keep that silly animal ears-headband?

Duh.

Something Hawaiian/beach-like - I can't tell you how many times I've had to wear a lei or lend my lei to girls going to a luau. I have a Hawaiian flower-print dress on hand (that my sister despises) that has also been borrowed.
The Bandanna - The bandanna can take many forms for a costume: cowboy and Indians party, a "thug" party, white trash party, etc. You can fulfill several dress-code requirements with this silly accessory alone.

...and for no other reason. Maybe camping. If that.

The Toga - I've had friends at college who keep an extra bed sheet around or some fabric just in case someone wants to pay homage to Animal House. Pillow cases are also handy for ABC parties.

Honestly, my dorm floor last year was majority sorority girls who went out every night, like my friends and I would - so if you go out frequently, these can be useful. If I've overlooked anything else please let me know. As a reminder, NONE of these refer to my personal tastes in fashion. So to keep my sister from having a heart attack, no, I don't go running around in public with animal ears. Good grief.

Things you won't find in my closet.

2009-07-05T23:25:00.000-04:00

Since I wrote about maxi-dresses (however briefly it was), I decided I should lay out my current annoyances with clothes I see worn by people in every day life. I am an every day person thus I find myself to be of reliable criticism, rather than feel self-entitled to judge anything like haute couture.

Gingham shirts

Large-print gingham shirts (like this one from Charlotte Russe) make me think of the Jonas brothers. I know that's unfair to all of the cool, trendy artsy students who wear these shirts and listen to actual music, but all I honestly see with these shirts are Disney pre-teens and the fan girls of those Disney pre-teens. One time I saw an extra on Hannah Montana wear a dress I own. I felt the opposite of cool. Now I only wear that dress to see elderly relatives.

Other gingham patterns don't seem to bother me as much, but I still don't own any gingham items.

Jumpsuits

forever21.com

Maybe it's because I've grown up in the suburbs of CT, maybe it's because it's the maxi dress in pant form, but I cannot stand jumpsuits. No. Paradoxically, I don't gnash my teeth when I see rompers. They're okay by me.

(photo nicked from Collegefashion.net)

Or maybe because almost anything Blake Lively wears is okay by me.

Two facts about me:
-Fan of Blake Lively
-My boyfriend hates wedges just because my friend, Sherman, hates wedges. Footnote: I still don't think he (the bf) even knows what wedges are.

Juicy Couture

Some might say this is "higher fashion " but seriously, Juicy is very pedestrian, therefore I have the right to voice my dislike for it. Wear it, love it, live it all you want, but you'll have a hard time convincing me to own anything Juicy or like it by any means. The end.

I hate Maxi dresses - Oh, Happy belated 4th!

2009-07-05T20:36:00.000-04:00

After watching fireworks on the rooftop in New Britain and driving home at an ungodly hour that would only be acceptable if I were mid-semester at college, I spent my sunny Sunday tanning by my friend's pool and wishing I had my own car to purchase a discounted this:

This is what I would sport as my LBD and today was my last day to use my coupon! Good thing my second one starts July 17th. I only buy things from Express once a season and I've been having trouble finding something with studs that doesn't make me think of Hot Topic swag. Collegefashion.net has reminded us that this summer, studs are big and are worth investing in (possibly because they can carry over into the fall unlike maxi dresses *sneer*).

Speaking of my distaste for maxi dresses, I had made a vow since my viewing of "What Not to Wear". When I found out I couldn't (well, shouldn't) wear minis after 30 that I will continue to prefer mini skirts/shorts/dresses until then (or until my legs give out). I suggest for those who find this rule news to do the same. Sadly, you aren't forever 21.

And in memory of F21's Free Shipping sale in celebration of July 4th, I'd like to take a moment to discuss monokini's:

top left: Forever 21, top middle: Charlotte Russe, top right: Victoria's Secret
bottom left: instyleswimwear.com, bottom right: Target

First thing I thought when I saw these things were that this is a fad for people who don't worry about tan lines. Ever. Perhaps they pay for it or, for some tanorexics, have a tanning bed instead of a mattress, but I will always prefer a tan earned by being outside - beach or otherwise. I find myself to have a square-ish figure so for curvy girls who can have the monokini work to their favor, good for you. Also, do not be fooled by fake monokinis.

photo courtesy of Forever 21

It's cute, it's funky, but that back string still makes it a low-cut onesy. This proves that when one thinks "monokini" they think "sexier than a one-piece". I don't think this would have sold as well if it were tagged as a one piece. Thoughts on one-pieces, anyone?

Hope you all had a good fourth of July!

While I'm here...

2009-07-04T02:05:00.000-04:00

I can't fathom why I started a blog. No one reads blogs anymore. I read blogs because I'm an English major with the patience to read longs texts in tiny font and I spend most of my time alone in the suburbs since I have no car of my own. What's YOUR excuse?

Remember way back when blogging was the IT thing? People with absolutely nothing to say were blogging bad poetry, complaints of that mean kid in their math class and conspiracy theories. People realized that as a whole most blogs were crap and the fad phased out. Even Maddox, my favorite back in the early 2000's, has lost its spark of entertainment since he updates once in a blue moon.

Now I've had to resort to websites like http://textsfromlastnight.com/ and http://www.wikihow.com/ for idle time wasters.

Wikihow.com is an amazing website. I think people take it for granted because it's written and edited by other people whose validities are questionable and prefer to go to the "experts". However, the how-to lists are fascinating and the related links are even better.

For instance, my friends and I like to plan themed parties to liven up the boring town I live in. I decided to go to wikihow.com to find any suggestions for parties. The results were staggering. My curiosity got the better of me when I simply HAD to check out "How to have a Zombie Themed Prom". Oh man! If only I were back in high school! Imagine the social exile I'd get into for suggesting it! I clicked it and briefed the page. Related links were as followed: "How to Tell Someone You Won't go to Prom with Them", "How to deal with a girlfriend chooses to go to prom with someone else", and "how to look like a zombie".

Just imagine the situation when you'd need these bits of advice.

Girl: Sorry I can't go to prom with you.
Boy: But...I thought we were dating! I thought we were going together!
Girl: You're not zombie enough.

...But I guess it most cases these days it's girls dumping guys because they're not like Edward.

There was also a very detailed page of "How to have a party by yourself". I didn't know whether to laugh hysterically or give sympathetic "aww"s for the long, meticulous list of steps and tips to throw a successful party when you are the only one. I guess Stoppard would label it as a "tragicomedy". There are some lonely people out there.

However, there are some reliable pages on wikiHow. One of my favorites which I couldn't accomplish in my given setting was the How to build a Hidden Door Bookshelf. If I had a door in my room that led to a smaller room, I would definitely want to install a bookshelf door. I currently keep my books on my shoe shelf (my shoes in my hanging shoe shelves) and I would love to have a bookshelf to store my books - and display my nicer shoes.

If you could write anything for wikiHow, as random as you can imagine, what would it be? What is your favorite wikiHow page?

Project for the Summer

2009-07-04T00:35:00.001-04:00

My project for the summer is to prove to myself that my love of writing wasn't a phase. I write in my journal but I get lazy and sometimes ostracize it to my left nightstand, forcing it to make friends with my dad's suggested "Russian 19-Century Gothic Tales". I only got half-way through one of those tales and learned I can't fully engross myself in a story when I can't pronounce any of the names of the characters. Examples: I had to nickname Praskovya Osipovna as "Susie".

I've been reading fashion blogs like Collegefashion.net, The Skinny by F21 and articles from other fashion-oriented websites and figured I should exercise my writing abilities by getting a blog myself. I'll give it two weeks tops.

I'm currently obsessing over grey jeans. Especially these:

Photo courtesy of Forever21.com.

Grey seems to be hitting hard this season; though Bazaar says to invest in grey cardigans for fall, I'm taking Cosmopolitan's side (gasp!) and going with the idea of grey as a "go-to neutral". I like the idea of using it as a neutral and taking a break from black and navy blue.

Two facts about me:

-I love Scrabble
-After college I want to work at a publishing company or work in the editorial department in some sector of the fashion industry

I'm going to study abroad in England for a semester come this September and I won't know what to tell those Brits when they ask me about Obama. Seriously. I'm that asshole of America who is completely apathetic to her government. I have friends who worship the guy like a rock star of the 60's and other friends - and family - who don't...uh...care for him. I read articles my brother will send me once in a while but I really won't know what to tell those Brits who probably love him.

Things I know about Obama:

-He's black (solid start)
-He likes Scrabble and Cranium
-He has a wife named Michelle
-Kids
-a dog (big deal apparently?)
-a Democrat

That's basically it. I don't watch the news because the media just kinda humps the man's leg like a neutered, horny wiener dog, but I haven't racked up any solid evidence (or memory of evidence told to me by my friend Mo, my brother, or parents) of why I would hate him so much. For those politically involved out there, please comment as you wish.

No one really sits me down and teaches me these things. And I don't have the motivation to get up off my ass and learn it myself. I barely passed Civics with a C. Then people just assume because I'm from a well-educated background that I MUST be opinionated and well informed. I'm not.

Fashion is another issue. My sister will give me tips and remarks about what I'm doing wrong dressing myself and how to correct it but she's never really explained the things I need to know if I want to work in the fashion industry. I love fashion, I spend too much on clothes and most of my websites are about fashion, yet I (knew full well beforehand that I would) failed the couture quiz at Style.com. Unlike politics, however, I'm motivated to learn for myself and study because I actually have an interest in it, unlike Obama. In any case, I'm determined to learn things I won't need to know when I go to England.

Links to informational websites, advice, and knowledge about fashion self-education would be helpful.

Oh, and anything on Obama would help too. I guess.